Aristophanes
The Birds
414 BC
Translator’s Note
This translation, which has been prepared by Ian Johnston of Malaspina University-College, Nanaimo, BC, Canada, is in the public domain and may be used, in whole or in part, for any purpose, without permission and without charge, provided the source is acknowledged. Released July 2003.
Note that in the following translation the normal numbers refer to this text, while the numbers in square brackets refer to the Greek text. Links to explanatory endnotes are indicated by an asterisk (*).
The translator would like to acknowledge the very valuable help he received from the notes in Alan H. Sommerstein’s edition of The Birds (Warminster: Aris and Phillips, 1987).
Printed copies of this text are available in the form of a chap book suitable for classroom use (at a price of $2.00 Canadian each plus postage). For details please contact Ian Johnston, Prideaux Street Publications, #201, 327 Prideaux Street, Nanaimo, BC, Canada, V9R 2N4 (ISBN 0-9733529-5-7) or check this link Prideaux Street Publications.
For comments, questions, suggestions for improvement, and so on, please contact Ian Johnston at Malaspina University-College, 900 Fifth Street, Nanaimo, BC, Canada, V9R 5S5 or at johnstoi@mala.bc.ca.
Historical Note
The Birds was first produced at the drama festival in 414 BC, where it won second prize. At this period, during the Peloponnesian War, Athens was very powerful and confident, having just launched the expedition to Sicily, fully expecting to triumph in that venture and in the larger war.
The Birds
Dramatis Personae
PISTHETAIROS:
a middle-aged Athenian
EUELPIDES: a middle-aged Athenian
SERVANT-BIRD: a slave serving Tereus, once a man
TEREUS: a hoopoe bird, once a man
FLAMINGO
PEACOCK
A SECOND HOOPOE
GLUTTON-BIRD: a fictitious species
CHORUS LEADER
CHORUS: of birds
XANTHIAS: slave serving Pisthetairos
MANODOROS: slave serving Euelpides, also called MANES.
PROCNE: a nightingale with a woman’s body, consort of Tereus.
PRIEST
POET
ORACLE MONGER: a collector and interpreter of oracles
METON: a land surveyor
COMMISSIONER OF COLONIES: an Athenian official
STATUTE SELLER: man who sells laws
FIRST MESSENGER: a construction-worker bird
SECOND MESSENGER: a soldier bird
IRIS: messenger goddess, daughter of Zeus
FIRST HERALD: a bird
YOUNG MAN: young Athenian who wants to beat up his father
CINESIAS: a very bad dithyrambic poet and singer
SYCOPHANT: a common informer
PROMETHEUS: the Titan
POSEIDON: god of the sea, brother of Zeus
HERCULES: the legendary hero, now divine
TRIBALLIAN GOD: an uncouth barbarian god
PRINCESS: a divine young lady
SECOND HERALD
Scene: A rugged, treed wilderness area up in the rocky hills. Enter Pisthetairos and Euelpides, both very tired. They are clambering down from the rocky heights towards the level stage. Pisthetairos has a crow perched on his arm or shoulder, and Euelpides has a jackdaw. Both Pisthetairos and Euelpides are carrying packs on their back. They are followed by two slaves carrying more bags. The slaves stay well out of the way until they get involved in the action later on.
EUELPIDES:
[speaking to the bird he is carrying]
Are you telling us to keep
going straight ahead?
Over there by that tree?
PISTHETAIROS:
Blast this bird—
it's croaking for us
to head back, go home.
EUELPIDES:
Why are we wandering up and down like this?
You're such a fool—this endless weaving round
will kill us both.
PISTHETAIROS:
I must be an idiot
to keep hiking on along
these pathways,
a hundred miles at
least, and just because
that's what this crow
keeps telling me to do.
EUELPIDES:
What about me? My poor toe nails are
thrashed.
10
I've worn them out because I’m following
what this jackdaw says.
PISTHETAIROS:
[looking around]
I've no idea
where on earth we are.
EUELPIDES:
You mean from here
you couldn't make it
back to your
place?
[10]
PISTHETAIROS:
No way—not even Execestides
could manage that.*
EUELPIDES: We’re in a real mess.
PISTHETAIROS: Well, you could try going along that pathway.
[The two men start exploring different paths down to opposite sides of the stage]
EUELPIDES:
We two were conned by that Philokrates,
the crazy vendor in the
marketplace
who sells his birds on
trays. He claimed these
two
20
would take us straight to Tereus the hoopoe,
a man who years ago
became a bird.
That's why we paid an
obol for this one,
this jackdaw, son of Tharreleides.*
and three more for the crow. And then
what?
The two know nothing, except how to
bite.
[The jackdaw with Euelpides begins to get excited about something. Euelpides talks to the bird]
What's got your attention now? In those
rocks?
[20]
You want to take us there? There's no way through.
PISTHETAIROS:
[calling across the stage to Euelpides]
By god, the same thing over
here, no road.
EUELPIDES: What’s your crow saying about the pathway? 30
PISTHETAIROS: By god, it's not cawing what it did before.
EUELPIDES: [shouting] But what's it saying about the road?
PISTHETAIROS:
Nothing—
it's saying nothing,
just keeps on croaking—
something about biting
my fingers off.
EUELPIDES:
[addressing the audience]
Don't you think it's
really odd the two of us,
ready and eager to
head off for the birds,*
just can't find the
way. You see, we're not well.
All you men sitting
there to hear our
words,
[30]
we're ill with a
disease, not like the one
which Sacas suffers,*
no—the
opposite.
40
He's no true
citizen, yet nonetheless
he's pushing his way
in by force, but we,
both honoured members
of our tribe and clan,*
both citizens among
you citizens,
with no one trying to
drive us from the city,
have winged our way
out of our native land
on our two feet. We
don't hate the city
because we think it's
not by nature great
and truly prosperous—open to all,
so they can spend
their money paying fines.
50
Cicadas chirp up in
the trees a while,
a month or two, but
our Athenians
[40]
keep chirping over
lawsuits all their lives.
That's why right now
we've set off on this trip,
with all this stuff—basket, pot, and myrtle boughs.*
We're looking for a
nice relaxing spot,
where we can settle
down, live out our lives.
We're heading for
Tereus, that hoopoe bird—
we'd like to know if
in his flying around
he's seen a city
like the one we
want.
60
PISTHETAIROS: Hey!
EUELPIDES: What?
PISTHETAIROS:
My crow keeps cawing upwards—
up there.
EUELPIDES:
My jackdaw's looking
up there,
too,
[50]
as if it wants to show
me something.
There must be birds
around these rocks. I know—
let's make noise and
then we'll see for sure.
PISTHETAIROS: You know what you should do? Kick that outcrop.
EUELPIDES: Why not use your head? There'd be twice the noise.
[Pisthetairos and Euelpides start climbing back up the rocky outcrops towards a door in the middle of the rocks]
PISTHETAIROS: Pick up a stone and then knock on the door.
EUELPIDES: All right. Here I go.
[Euelpides knocks very loudly on the door and calls out]
Hey, boy . . . boy!
PISTHETAIROS:
What are you saying? Why call the hoopoe “boy”?
70
Don't say that—you
should call out [giving a bird call] “hoopoe-ho.”
EUELPIDES:
[knocking on the door and calling again]
Hoopoe-ho! . . . Should I knock
again? . . . Hoopoe-ho!
SERVANT-BIRD: [inside] Who is it? Who's shouting for my master? [60]
[The door opens and an actor-bird emerges. He has a huge beak which terrifies Euelpides and Pisthetairos They fall back in fear, and the birds they have been carrying disappear]
EUELPIDES: My lord Apollo, save us! That gaping beak—
SERVANT-BIRD:
[also frightened]
Oh, oh, now we're in for it.
You two men,
you're bird-catchers!
EUELPIDES:
Don't act so weird!
Can't you say something
nice?
SERVANT-BIRD:
[trying to scare them off]
You two men will die!
EUELPIDES: But we're not men.
SERVANT-BIRD: What? What are you, then?
EUELPIDES: Well . . . I'm a chicken-shitter . . . a Libyan bird . . .
SERVANT-BIRD: That's rubbish.
EUELPIDES:
No, it's not—I've just dropped my load—
80
down both my legs. You can take a look.
SERVANT-BIRD:
And this one here?
What kind of bird is he?
[to Pisthetairos] Can you speak?
PISTHETAIROS: Me? . . . a crapper-fowl . . . from Phasis.
EUELPIDES: God knows what kind of animal you are!
SERVANT-BIRD: I'm a servant bird.
EUELPIDES:
Beaten by some
rooster
[70]
in a cock fight?
SERVANT-BIRD:
No. It was my master—
when he became a hoopoe, well,
I prayed
that I could turn into a bird.
That way
he'd still have me to serve
and wait on him.
EUELPIDES: Does a bird need his own butler bird? 90
SERVANT-BIRD:
He does—I think it's got something to do
with the fact that earlier
he was a man.
So if he wants to taste
some fish from Phalerum,
I grab a plate and run off
for sardines.
If he wants soup, we need
pot and ladle,
so I dash off for the
spoon.
EUELPIDES:
A runner bird—
that's what you are. Well, my
little runner,
do you know what we'd
like to have you
do?
[80]
Go call your master for us.
SERVANT-BIRD:
But he's asleep—
for heaven's sake, his
after-dinner snooze—
100
he's just had gnats and myrtle berries.
EUELPIDES: Wake him up anyway.
SERVANT-BIRD:
I know for sure
he'll be annoyed, but I'll
do it, just for you.
[Exit Servant-Bird back through the doors]
PISTHETAIROS: Damn that bird—he scared me half to death.
EUELPIDES: Bloody hell—he frightened off my bird!
PISTHETAIROS:
You're such a coward—the worst there is.
Were you so scared you let that jackdaw
go?
EUELPIDES:
What about you? Didn't you collapse
and let your crow escape?
PISTHETAIROS: Not me, by god.
EUELPIDES: Where is it then?
PISTHETAIROS: It flew off on its own. 110 [90]
EUELPIDES: You didn't let go? What a valiant man!
TEREUS:
[from inside, speaking in a grand style]
Throw open this wood, so I may issue
forth.
[The doors open. Enter Tereus, a hoopoe bird, with feathers on his head and wings but none on his body. He struts and speaks with a ridiculously affected confidence. Euelpides and Pisthetairos are greatly amused at his appearance]
EUELPIDES:
Oh Hercules, what kind of beast is this?
What's that plumage? What sort of triple
crest?
TEREUS: Who are the persons here who seek me out?
EUELPIDES The twelve gods, it seems, have worked you over.*
TEREUS:
Does seeing my feathers make you scoff at me?
Strangers, I was once upon a time a man.
EUELPIDES: It's not you we’re laughing at.
TEREUS: Then what is it?
EUELPIDES: It's your beak—to us it looks quite funny. 120
TEREUS:
It's how Sophocles distorts Tereus—
[100]
that's me—in his tragedies.
EUELPIDES:
You're Tereus?
Are you a peacock or a bird?*
TEREUS: I am a bird.
EUELPIDES: Then where are all your feathers?
TEREUS: They've fallen off.
EUELPIDES: Have you got some disease?
TEREUS:
No, it's not that.
In winter time all birds shed their feathers,
then new ones grow again. But tell me this—
who are the two of you?
EUELPIDES: Us? We're human beings.
TEREUS: From what race were you born?
EUELPIDES:
Our origin?
In Athens—which makes the finest
warships.
130
TEREUS: Ah, so you're jury-men, are you?
EUELPIDES:
No, no.
We're different—we keep away from juries.
TEREUS: Does that seedling flourish in those parts? [110]
EUELPIDES:
If you go searching in the countryside,
you'll find a few.
TEREUS:
So why have you come here?
What do you need?
EUELPIDES: To talk to you.
TEREUS: What for?
EUELPIDES:
Well, you were once a man, as we are now.
You owed people money, as we do now.
You loved to skip the debt, as we do now.
Then you changed your nature, became a
bird.
140
You fly in circles over land and sea.
You've learned whatever's known to birds and men.
That's why we’ve come as suppliants to you,
[120]
to ask if you can tell us of some town,
where life is sheepskin soft, where we can
sleep.
TEREUS: Are
you looking for a mighty city,
more powerful than what Cranaus built?*
EUELPIDES:
Not one more powerful, no. What we want
is one which better suits the two of us.
TEREUS: You clearly want an aristocracy. 150
EUELPIDES:
Me? No, not at all. The son of Scellias
is someone I detest.*
TEREUS:
All
right, then,
What kind of city would you like to live in?
EUELPIDES:
I’d like a city where my biggest problem
would be something like this—in the morning
a friend comes to my door and says to me,
"In the name of Olympian Zeus, take a
bath,
[130]
an early one, you and your
children,
then come to my place for the
wedding feast
I'm putting on. Don’t
disappoint me now.
160
If you do, then don't come
looking for me
when my affairs get difficult for me."*
TEREUS:
By heaven, you poor man, you do love trouble.
What about you?
PISTHETAIROS: I'd like the same.
TEREUS: Like what?
PISTHETAIROS:
To have the father of some handsome lad
come up to me, as if I'd done him wrong,
and tell me off with some complaint like this—
"A fine thing there between you and my
son,
[140]
you old spark. You met him coming
back
from the gymnasium, after his bath—
170
you didn't kiss or greet him with
a hug,
or even try tickling his testicles—
yet you're a friend of mine, his father."
TEREUS:
How you yearn for problems, you unhappy man.
There is a happy city by the sea,
the Red Sea, just like the one you
mention.*
EUELPIDES:
No, no. Not by the sea! That's not for us,
not where that ship Salamia can show up
with some man on board to serve a summons
early in the morning. What about
Greece?
180
Can you tell us of some city there?*
TEREUS:
Why not go and settle down in Elis—
in Lepreus?
EUELPIDES:
In Leprous? By the gods,
I hate the place—although I've never seen it—
[150]
it’s all Melanthius' fault.*
TEREUS:
You could go
to the Opuntians—they're in Locris—
you might settle there.
EUELPIDES:
Be Opuntius—
no way, not for a talent's weight in gold.*
But what's it like here, living
with the birds?
You must know it well.
TEREUS:
It's not
unpleasant.
190
First of all, you have to live without a purse.
EUELPIDES: So you're rid of one great source of fraud in life.
TEREUS:
In the gardens we enjoy white
sesame,
[160]
the myrtles, mint, and poppies.
EUELPIDES:
So you live
just like newly-weds.
PISTHETAIROS:
That's it! I've got it!
I see a great plan for this race of
birds—
and power, too, if you'll trust
what I say.
TEREUS: What do you want to get us all to do?
PISTHETAIROS:
What should you be convinced to do? Well, first,
don't just fly about in all directions,
200
your beaks wide open—that makes you despised.
With us, you see, if you spoke of men
who always flit about and if you asked,
"Who's that Teleas" someone would respond,
"The man's a bird—he’s unreliable,
flighty, vague, never stays in one
place long."*
[170]
TEREUS:
By Dionysus, that's a valid point—
the criticism's fair. What should
we do?
PISTHETAIROS: Settle down together in one city.
TEREUS: What sort of city could we birds set up? 210
PISTHETAIROS:
Why ask that? What a stupid thing to say!
Look down.
TEREUS: All right.
PISTHETAIROS: Now look up.
TEREUS: I'm looking up.
PISTHETAIROS: Turn your head round to the side.
TEREUS:
By Zeus,
this'll do me good, if I twist off my neck.
PISTHETAIROS: What do you see?
TEREUS: Clouds and sky.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, then,
isn't this a staging area for birds?
TEREUS: A staging area? How come it's that?
PISTHETAIROS:
You might say it's a location for them—
[180]
there's lots of business here, but everything
keeps moving through this zone, so
it's now called
220
a staging place. But if you settled here,
fortified it, and fenced it off with walls,
this staging area could become your state.
Then you'd rule all men as if they're locusts
and annihilate the gods with
famine,
just like in Melos.*
TEREUS: How'd we manage that?
PISTHETAIROS:
Look, between earth and heaven there's the air.
Now, with us, when we want to go to
Delphi,
we have to ask permission to pass
through
from the Boeotians. You should do
the same.
230
When men sacrifice, make gods pay you
cash.
[190]
If not, you don't grant them rights of passage.
You'll stop the smell of roasting
thigh bones
moving through an empty space and
city
which don't belong to them.
TEREUS:
Wow!!! Yippee!!
By earth, snares, traps, nets, what a marvellous scheme!
I've never heard a neater plan! So now,
with your help, I'm going to
found a city,
if other birds agree.
PISTHETAIROS:
The other birds?
Who's going to lay this business out to
them?
240
TEREUS:
You can do it. I've taught them how to
speak.
[200]
Before I came, they could only twitter,
but I've been with them here a long, long time.
PISTHETAIROS: How do you call to bring them all together?
TEREUS:
Easy. I'll step inside my thicket here,
and wake my nightingale. Then we'll
both call.
Once they hear our voices they'll come running.
PISTHETAIROS:
Oh, you darling bird, now don't just stand there—
not when I'm begging you to go
right now,
get in your thicket, wake your
nightingale.
250
[Tereus goes back through the doors]*
TEREUS:
[singing]
Come my queen, don't sleep
so long,
pour
forth the sound of sacred song—
[210]
lament once more through lips
divine
for Itys, your dead child and
mine,
the one we've cried for all
this time.*
Sing out your music's liquid
trill
in
that vibrato voice—the thrill
which
echoes in those purest tones
through
leafy haunts of yew trees roams
and
rises up to Zeus'
throne.
260
Apollo with the golden hair
sits listening to your music
there—
and in response he plucks his
string—
his lyre of ivory then brings
the gods themselves to dance
and sing.
Then from gods' mouths in
harmony
[220]
come sounds of sacred melody.
[A flute starts playing within, in imitation of the nightingale’s song. The melody continues for a few moments]
EUELPIDES:
By lord Zeus, that little birdie's got a voice!
She pours her honey all through
that thicket!
PISTHETAIROS: Hey!
EUELPIDES: What?
PISTHETAIROS: Shut up.
EUELPIDES: Why?
PISTHETAIROS:
That hoopoe bird— 270
he's all set to sing another song.
TEREUS: [issuing a bird call to all the birds. His song or chant is accompanied by the flute indicating the nightingale’s song]
Epo-popo-popo-popo-popoi,
Io, io, ito, ito, ito, ito.
Come here to me,
all you with feathers just like
mine,
[230]
all you who live in country fields
fresh-ploughed, still full of seed,
and all you thousand tribes
who munch on barley corn
who gather up the
grain,
280
and fly at such a speed
and utter your sweet cries,
all you who in the furrows there
twitter on the turned-up earth,
and sweetly sing
tio tio tio tio tio tio tio tio—
All those of you
who like to scavenge food
from garden ivy
shoots,
[240]
all you in the hills up
there
290
who eat from olive and arbutus trees.
come here as quickly as you can,
fly here in answer to this call—
trio-to trio-to toto-brix!
And every one of you
in low-lying marshy ground
who snap sharp-biting gnats,
by regions of well-watered land,
and lovely fields of Marathon,
all you variously coloured
birds,
300
godwits and francolins—
I'm calling you.
You flocks who fly across the
seas
[250]
across the waves with halcyons
come here to learn the news.
We're all assembling here,
all tribes of long-neck birds.
A shrewd old man's arrived—
he's here with a new plan,
a man of
enterprise,
310
all set to improvise.
So gather all of you
to hear his words.
[The final words gradually change from coherent speech into a bird call]
Come here, come here,
come here, come here.
Toro-toro toro-toro-tix
Kik-kabau,
kik-kabau.
[260]
Toro-toro toro-toro li-li-lix
[Euelpides and Pisthetairos start looking up into the sky for birds]
PISTHETAIROS: Seen any birds lately?
EUELPIDES:
No,
by Apollo, I haven't—
even though I'm staring up into
the sky,
320
not even blinking.
PISTHETAIROS:
It seems to me
that hoopoe bird was just wasting time
hiding, like a curlew, in that thicket,
and screaming out his bird calls—
[imitating Tereus] po-poi po-poi
[There is an instant response to Pisthetairos’ call from off stage, a loud bird call which really scares Pisthetairos and Euelpides]
BIRD [offstage] Toro-tix, toro-tix.
PISTHETAIROS: Hey, my good man, here comes a bird.
[Enter a flamingo, very tall and flaming red-something Pisthetairos and Euelpides have never seen]
EUELPIDES:
By
Zeus,
that's a bird?
What kind would you call that?
It couldn't be a
peacock, could it?
[Tereus re-enters from the thicket]
PISTHETAIROS:
Tereus here will tell us. Hey, my
friend,
330
what's that bird
there?
TEREUS:
Not
your everyday fowl—
the kind you always
see. She's a marsh
bird.
[270]
EUELPIDES: My goodness, she's gorgeous—flaming red!
TEREUS: Naturally, that's why she's called Flamingo.
[A second bird enters, a Peacock]
EUELPIDES: [to Pisthetairos] Hey . . .
PISTHETAIROS: What is it?
EUELPIDES: Another bird's arrived.
PISTHETAIROS:
You're right. By god, this one looks really odd.
[To Tereus]
Who's this bizarre bird-prophet of the Muse,
this strutter from
the hills?
TEREUS: He's called the Mede.
PISTHETAIROS:
He’s a Mede? By lord Hercules, how come
a Mede flew here
without his
camel?
340
EUELPIDES: Here's another one . . .
[The next bird enters, another Hoopoe]
.
. . what a crest of feathers!
PISTHETAIROS: [To Tereus]
What's this
marvel? You're not the only
hoopoe?
[280]
This here's
another one?
TEREUS:
He's
my grandson—
son of Philocles
the Hoopoe—it's like
those names you
pass along, when you call
Hipponicus the son
of Callias,
and Callias son of
Hipponicus.*
PISTHETAIROS:
So this bird is Callias. His feathers—
he seems to have
lost quite a few.
TEREUS:
Yes,
that's true—
being a well-off
bird he's plucked by
parasites,
350
and female
creatures flock around him, too,
to yank his plumage
out.
[Enter the Glutton-bird, an invented species, very fat and brightly coloured]
PISTHETAIROS:
By
Poseidon,
here’s another
bright young bird. What's it called?
TEREUS: This one's the Glutton-bird.
PISTHETAIROS:
Another
glutton?
Cleonymus is not
the only one?*
EUELPIDES:
If this bird were like our
Cleonymus,
[290]
wouldn't he have
thrown away his crest?
PISTHETAIROS:
Why do all the birds display such head crests?
Are they going to
run a race in armour?
TEREUS:
No, my dear fellow, they live up on the
crests,
360
because it's
safer, like the Carians.*
PISTHETAIROS:
[looking offstage] Holy Poseidon, do you see those birds!
What a fowl bunch of them—all flocking here!
EUELPIDES:
[looking in the same direction]
Lord Apollo, there's
a huge bird cloud! Wow!
So many feathered
wings in there I can't see
a way through all
those feathers to the wings.
[Enter the Chorus of Birds in a dense mass. Pisthetairos and Euelpides clamber up the rock to get a better look at them]
PISTHETAIROS
Hey,
look at that—
it's a partridge,
and that one over there,
by Zeus, a
francolin—there's a widgeon—
and that's a
halcyon!
EUELPIDES: What’s the one behind her?
PISTHETAIROS: What is it? It's a spotted shaver.
EUELPIDES:
Shaver?
370
You mean there's
a bird that cuts our hair?
PISTHETAIROS:
Why
not?
After all, there's
that barber in the city—
the one we all call
Sparrow Sporgilos.*
[300]
Here comes an owl.
EUELPIDES:
Well,
what about that?
Who brings owls to
Athens?*
PISTHETAIROS:
[identifying birds in the crowd]
.
. . a turtle dove,
a jay, lark, sedge
bird . . .
EUELPIDES: . . . finch, pigeon . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
.
. . falcon,
hawk, ring dove . .
.
EUELPIDES: . . . cuckoo, red shank . . .
PISTHETAIROS: . . . fire-crest . . .
EUELPIDES:
. . . porphyrion, kestrel, dabchick, bunting,
vulture, and that
one's there's a . . . [he’s
stumped]
PISTHETAIROS: . . . woodpecker!!
EUELPIDES:
What a crowd of birds! A major flock of
fowls!
380
All that twitter as
they prance around,
those rival cries!
. . . Oh, oh, what's going on?
Are they a threat?
They’re looking straight at us—
their beaks are
open!
PISTHETAIROS: It looks that way to me.
CHORUS
LEADER: [starting with a bird call]
To-toto-to
to-toto-to to-to.
[310]
Who's been
calling me?
Where's he keep
his nest?
TEREUS:
I'm the one. I've been waiting here a while.
I've not left my
bird friends in the lurch.
CHORUS
LEADER: Ti-tit-ti ti-tit-ti
ti-ti-ti-ti
390
tell me as a friend
what you have to say.
TEREUS:
I have news for all of us—something safe,
judicious, sweet,
and profitable.
Two men have just
come here to visit me,
two subtle thinkers
. . .
CHORUS LEADER [interrupting] What? What are you saying?
TEREUS:
I'm telling you two old men have arrived—
[320]
they've come from
lands where human beings live
and bring the stalk
of a stupendous plan.
CHORUS
LEADER: You fool! This is the most disastrous thing
since I was
hatched. What are you telling
us?
400
TEREUS: Don't be afraid of what I have to say.
CHORUS LEADER: What have you done to us?
TEREUS:
I've
welcomed here
two men in love
with our society.
CHORUS LEADER: You dared to do that?
TEREUS:
Yes,
indeed, I did.
And I'm very
pleased I did so.
CHORUS
LEADER:
These
two men of yours,
are they among us
now?
TEREUS: Yes, as surely as I am.
CHORUS
[breaking into a song of indignation]
Aiiii,
aiiiii
He's
cheated us,
he's
done us wrong.
That
friend of ours,
410
who
all along
has
fed with us
in
fields we
share,
[330]
now
breaks old laws
and
doesn't care.
We
swore a pact
of
all the birds.
He's
now trapped us
with
deceitful words—
so
power goes
420
to
all our foes,
that
wicked race
which
since its birth
was
raised for war
with
us on earth.
CHORUS
LEADER: We'll have some words with that one later.
These two old men
should get their punishment—
I think we should
give it now. Let's do it—
rip 'em to
pieces, bit by bit.
PISTHETAIROS: We're done for.
EUELPIDES:
It's all your fault—getting us into this
mess.
430
Why'd you bring
me here?
PISTHETAIROS: I wanted you to come. [340]
EUELPIDES: What? So I could weep myself to death?
PISTHETAIROS:
Now, you're really talking nonsense—
how do you intend
to weep, once these birds
poke out your eyes?
CHORUS:
[advancing towards Pisthetairos and Euelpides
On,
on . . .
let's move in to
attack,
and launch a bloody
rush,
come in from front
and back,
and break 'em in
the crush—
with wings on every
side
440
they'll have no
place to hide.
These two will
start to howl,
when my beak starts
to eat
and makes 'em
food for fowl.
There's no
well-shaded peak,
no cloud or
salt-grey
sea
[350]
where they can flee
from me.
CHORUS
LEADER: Now let's bite and tear these two apart!
Where's the
brigadier? Bring up the right wing!
[The birds start to close in on Pisthetairos and Euelpides, cowering up on the rocks]
EUELPIDES: This is it! I’m done for. Where can I run? 450
PISTHETAIROS: Why aren't you staying put?
EUELPIDES:
Here
with you?
I don’t want 'em
to rip me into pieces.
PISTHETAIROS: How do you intend to get away from them?
EUELPIDES: I haven't a clue.
PISTHETAIROS:
Then
I'll tell you how—
we have to stay
right here and fight it out.
So put that
cauldron down.
[Pisthetairos takes the cauldron from Euelpides and sets it down on the ground in front of them]
EUELPIDES: What good's a cauldron?
PISTHETAIROS: It'll keep the owls away from us.
EUELPIDES: What about the birds with claws?
PISTHETAIROS:
[rummaging in the pack and producing a barbecue spit]
Grab
this spit—
stick it in the
ground in front of you.
EUELPIDES: How do we protect our eyes? [360]
PISTHETAIROS:
[producing a couple of tin bowls]
An
upturned bowl.
460
Set this on your
head.
EUELPIDES:
[putting the tin bowl upside down on his head and holding up the pot, with
the spit stuck in the ground]
That's
brilliant!
What a grand stroke
of warlike strategy!
In military matters
you're the best—
already smarter
than that Nikias*
[Pisthetairos and Euelpides, with tin bowls on their heads, await the birds’ charge-with Pisthetairos hiding behind Euelpides who is holding up the big pot. Their two slaves cower behind them]
CHORUS
LEADER:
El-el-el-eu
. . . Charge!
Keep those beaks
level—no holding back now!
Pull 'em, scratch 'em, hit
'em, rip their skins off!
Go smash that big
pot first of all.
[As the Chorus is about to start its charge, Tereus rushes in between the two men and the Chorus and tries to stop the Chorus Leader]
TEREUS:
Hold on, you wickedest of animals!
Tell me this: Why
do you want to kill these
men,
470
to tear them both
to bits? They’ve done no wrong.
Besides, they're
my wife's relatives, her clansmen.
CHORUS
LEADER: Why should we be more merciful to them
than we are to
wolves? What other animals
are greater enemies
of ours than them?
Have we got better
targets for
revenge?
[370]
TEREUS:
Yes, by nature enemies—but what if
they've got good
intentions? What if they've come
to teach you
something really valuable?
CHORUS
LEADER: How could they ever teach us anything,
480
or tell us
something useful—they're enemies,
our feathered
forefathers' fierce foes.
TEREUS:
But folks with fine minds find from foemen
they can learn a
lot. Caution saves us all.
We don't learn
that from friends. But enemies
can force that
truth upon us right away.
That's why cities
learn, not from their allies,
but from enemies,
how to build high walls,
assemble fleets of
warships—in that way,
their knowledge
saves their children, homes, and
goods.
490
[380]
CHORUS
LEADER: Well, here's what seems best to me—first of all,
let's hear what
they have come to say. It's true—
our enemies can
teach us something wise.
PISTHETAIROS:
[to Euelpides}
I think their anger's
easing off. Let's retreat.
[Pisthetairos and Euelpides inch their way toward the doors, still bunched together, with Euelpides holding up the pot]
TEREUS:
[to the Chorus Leader]
It's only fair—and you do owe me a favour,
out of gratitude.
CHORUS
LEADER:
In
other things,
before today, we've
never stood against you.
PISTHETAIROS:
They're acting now more peacefully to us—
so put that pot and
bowl down on the ground.
But we'd better
hang onto the spit, our spear.
500
We'll use it on
patrol inside our camp
[390]
right by this
cauldron here. Keep your eyes peeled—
don't even think
of flight.
[Euelpides puts down the cauldron, removes his tin-plate helmet, and marches with the spear back and forth by the cauldron, on guard]
EUELPIDES:
What happens if we're killed? Where on earth
will we be buried?
PISTHETAIROS:
In
Kerameikos—
where the potters
live—they'll bury both of us.
We'll get it done
and have the public pay—
I'll tell the
generals we died in battle,
fighting with the
troops at Orneai.*
CHORUS
LEADER: Fall back into the ranks you held before.
510 [400]
Bend over, and like
well-armed soldier boys,
put your spirit and
your anger down.
We'll look into
who these two men may be,
where they come
from, what their intentions are.
[The Chorus of Birds breaks up and retreats]
Hey, Hoopoe bird, I'm calling you!
TEREUS:
You
called?
What would you like
to hear?
CHORUS
LEADER:
These
two men—
where do they come
from and who are they?
TEREUS: These strangers are from Greece, font of wisdom.
CHORUS
LEADER: What accident or words
[410]
now brings them to
the
birds?
520
TEREUS:
The two men love your life,
adore the way you
live—
they want to share
with you
in all there is to
give.
CHORUS
LEADER: What's that you just said?
What plan is in
their head?
TEREUS:
Things you’d never think about—
you'll be amazed—just hear him out.
CHORUS
LEADER: He thinks it's good that he
should stay and
live with me?
530
Is he trusting in
some plan
to help his fellow
man
or thump his
enemy?
[420]
TEREUS:
He talks of happiness
too great for
thought or words
He claims this
emptiness—
all space—is for the birds—
here, there, and everywhere.
You'll be convinced, I swear.
CHORUS LEADER: Is he crazy in the head? 540
TEREUS: He is shrewder than I said.
CHORUS LEADER: A brilliant thinking box?
TEREUS:
The subtlest, sharpest fox—
he's been around a lot
knows every scheme and
plot.
[430]
CHORUS
LEADER: Ask him to speak to us, to tell us all.
As I listen now to what you're
telling me,
it makes me feel like
flying—taking
off!
TEREUS:
[to the two slaves]
Take their suits of armour in
the house—
hang the stuff up in the
kitchen there,
550
beside the cooking stool—may it bring good luck!
[turning to Pisthetairos]
Now you. Lay out your plans—explain to them
the reason why I called them
all together.
[Pisthetairos is struggling with the servants, refusing to give up his armour]
PISTHETAIROS:
No. By Apollo, I won't do it—
not unless they swear a pact with me
just like one that monkey
Panaitios,
[440]
who makes our knives, had his wife swear to him—
not to bite or pull my balls or
poke me.
CHORUS LEADER: You mean up your . . .
PISTHETAIROS: No, not there. I mean the eyes.
CHORUS LEADER: Oh, I’ll agree to that.
PISTHETAIROS: Then swear an oath on it. 560
CHORUS
LEADER: I swear on this condition—that I get
all the judges' and
spectators' votes and win.*
PISTHETAIROS: Oh, you'll win!
CHORUS
LEADER:
And if I break the oath
then let me win by just a
single vote.
Listen all of you! The armed
infantry
can now pick up their weapons
and go home.
Keep an eye out for any
bulletins
we put up on our notice
boards.
[450]
CHORUS:
[singing] Man's by nature's born to lie.
But state your case. Give it a
try.
570
There's a chance you have observed
some useful things inside this bird,
some greater power I possess,
which my dull brain has never
guessed.
So tell all here just what you
see.
If there's a benefit to me,
we’ll share in it communally.
CHORUS
LEADER: Tell us the business that's brings you
here.
[460]
Persuade us of your views. So speak right up.
No need to be afraid—we've made a pact—
580
we won't be the ones who break it first.
PISTHETAIROS:
[aside to Euelpides]
By god, I'm full of words,
bursting to speak.
I've worked my speech like well-mixed flour—
like kneading dough. There's nothing stopping me.
[giving instructions to the two slaves]
You, lad, fetch me a speaker's wreath—and, you,
bring water here, so I can wash my hands.
[The two slaves go into the house and return with a wreath and some water]
EUELPIDES:
[whispering to Pisthetairos]
You mean it's time for
dinner? What's going on?
PISTHETAIROS:
For a long time now I've been keen, by god,
to give them a stupendous speech—overstuffed—
something to shake their tiny
birdy
souls.
590
[Pisthetairos, with the wreath on his head, now turns to the birds and begins his formal oration]
I'm so sorry for you all, who once were kings . . .
CHORUS LEADER: Kings? Us? What of?
PISTHETAIROS:
You were kings indeed,
you ruled over everything there
is—
over him and me, first of all,
and then
over Zeus himself. You see,
your ancestry
goes back before old Kronos and
the Titans,
way back before even Earth
herself!*
CHORUS LEADER: Before the Earth?
PISTHETAIROS: Yes, by Apollo.
CHORUS LEADER: Well, that's something I never knew before! [470]
PISTHETAIROS:
That’s because you're naturally uninformed—
600
you lack resourcefulness. You've not read Aesop.
His story tells us that the lark was born
before the other birds, before
the Earth.
Her father then grew sick and
died. For five days
he lay there unburied—there was
no Earth.
Not knowing what to do, at last
the lark,
at her wits' end, set him in her
own head.
EUELPIDES:
So now, the father of the lark lies dead
in a headland plot.
PISTHETAIROS:
So if they were born
before the Earth, before the
gods, well then,
610
as the eldest, don't they get the right to rule?
EUELPIDES: By Apollo, yes they do.
[addressing the audience]
So you out there,
look ahead and sprout
yourselves a beak—
in good time Zeus will hand his
sceptre
back
[480]
to the birds who peck his sacred oaks.
PISTHETAIROS:
Way back then it wasn't gods who ruled.
They didn't govern men. No. It was the birds.
There's lots of proof for this. I'll mention here
example number one—the fighting cock—
first lord and king of all
those
Persians,
620
well before the time of human kings—
those Dariuses and Megabazuses.
Because he was their king, the
cock's still called
the Persian Bird.
EUELPIDES:
That's why to this very day
the cock's the only bird to strut about
like some great Persian king, and on his head
he wears his crown erect.
PISTHETAIROS:
He was so great,
so mighty and so strong, that
even now,
thanks to his power then, when
he sings out
his early morning song, all men
leap up
630
to head for work—blacksmiths, potters,
tanners,
[490]
men who deal in corn or
supervise the baths,
or make our shields or
fabricate our lyres—
they all lace on their shoes
and set off in the dark.
EUELPIDES:
I can vouch for that! I had some bad luck,
thanks to that cock—I lost my cloak to thieves,
a soft and warm one, too, of
Phrygian wool.
I’d been invited to a festive
do,
where some child was going to get his name,
right here in the city. I'd had
some drinks—
640
and those drinks, well, they made me fall asleep.
Before the other guests began
to eat,
that bird lets rip his
cock-a-doodle-doo!
I thought it was the early
morning call.
So I run off for Halimus*—but then,
just outside the city walls, I
get mugged,
some coat thief hits me square
across the back—
he used a cudgel! When I fall
down there,
about to cry for help, he
steals my cloak!
PISTHETAIROS:
To resume—way back then the Kite was
king.
650
He ruled the Greeks.
CHORUS LEADER: King of the Greeks!!
PISTHETAIROS:
That’s right.
As king he was the first to show us
how
[500]
to grovel on the ground before a kite.
EUELPIDES:
By Dionysus, I once saw a kite
and rolled along the ground,
then, on my back,
my mouth wide open, gulped an
obol down.
I had to trudge home with an
empty sack.*
PISTHETAIROS:
Take Egypt and Phoenicia—they were ruled
by Cuckoo kings. And when they
cried "Cuckoooo!!"
all those Phoenicians harvested their crop—
660
the wheat and barley in their fields.
EUELPIDES:
That's why
if someone's cock is ploughing your wife’s field,
we call you "Cuckoo!"—you're being fooled!*
PISTHETAIROS:
The kingship of the birds was then so strong
that in the cities of the
Greeks a king—
an Agamemnon, say, or Menelaus—
had a bird perched on his regal
sceptre.
And it got its own share of all
the
gifts
[510]
the king received.
EUELPIDES:
Now, that I didn't know.
I always get amazed in
tragedies
670
when some king Priam comes on with a bird.
I guess it stands on guard
there, keeping watch
to see what presents Lysicrates
gets.*
PISTHETAIROS:
Here’s the weirdest proof of all—lord Zeus
who now commands the sky, because he's king,
carries an eagle on his head. There's more—
his daughter has an owl, and Apollo,
like a servant, has a hawk.
EUELPIDES:
That's right,
by Demeter! What’s the reason for those birds?
PISTHETAIROS:
So when someone makes a
sacrifice
680
and then, in accordance with tradition,
puts the guts into god's
hands, the birds
can seize those entrails well before Zeus can.
Back then no man would swear
upon the gods—
they swore their oaths on
birds. And even
now,
[520]
our Lampon seals his promises "By Goose,"
when he intends to cheat.* In days gone by,
all men considered you like
that—as great
and sacred beings. Now they all
think of you
as slaves and fools and useless
layabouts.
690
They throw stones at you, as if you're mad.
And every hunter in the temples there
sets up his traps—all those nooses, gins,
limed sticks and snares, fine
mesh and hunting nets,
and cages, too. Then once they've
got you trapped,
they sell you by the
bunch. Those who come to buy
poke and prod your flesh.
If you seem good to
eat,
[530]
they don't simply roast you by yourself—no!
They grate on cheese, mix
oil and silphium
with vinegar—and then whip up a
sauce,
700
oily and sweet, which they pour on you hot,
as if you were a chunk of
carrion meat.
CHORUS:
This human speaks
of our great pain
our fathers'
sins
[540]
we mourn again—
born into rule,
they threw away
what they received,
their fathers'
sway.
710
But now you’ve come—
fine stroke of fate—
to save our cause.
Here let me state
I'll trust myself
and all my chicks
to help promote
your politics.
CHORUS
LEADER: You need to stick around to tell us all
what we should do. Our lives
won't be worth living
720
unless by using every
scheme there is
we get back what's ours—our sovereignty.
PISTHETAIROS:
Then the first point I'd advise you of is
this:
[550]
there should be one single
city of the birds.
Next, you should encircle
the entire air,
all this space between the
earth and heaven,
with a huge wall of baked
brick—like Babylon.
EUELPIDES:
Oh Kebriones and Porphyrion!
What a mighty place! How
well fortified!*
PISTHETAIROS:
When you've completed that, demand from Zeus
730
he give you back your
rule. If he says no,
he doesn't want to and
won't sign on at once,
you then declare a holy war on
him.
Tell those gods they can't
come through your space
with cocks erect, the way they
used to do,
rushing down to screw another
woman—
like Alkmene, Semele, or Alope.*
For if you ever catch them
coming down
you'll stamp your seal right
on their swollen pricks—
[560]
they won’t be fucking women any
more.
740
And I'd advise you send
another bird
as herald down to human beings
to say
that since the birds from now
on will be kings,
they have to offer sacrifice to
them.
The offerings to the gods take
second place.
Then each of the gods must be
closely matched
with an appropriate bird. So if
a man
is offering Athena holy
sacrifice,
he must first give the Coot
some barley corn.
If sacrificing sheep to god
Poseidon,
750
let him bring toasted
wheat grains to the Duck.
And anyone who's going
to sacrifice
to Hercules must give the
Cormorant
some honey cakes. A ram for
Zeus the king?
Then first, because the Wren is
king of birds,
ahead of Zeus himself, his
sacrifice
requires the worshipper to
execute
an uncastrated gnat.
EUELPIDES:
I like that bit about
the slaughtered gnat. Now
thunder on, great Zan.*
[570]
CHORUS
LEADER: But how will humans think of us as
gods
760
and not just jackdaws flying around on wings?
PISTHETAIROS:
A foolish question. Hermes is a god,
and he has wings and flies—so do others,
all sorts of them. There's
Victory, for one,
with wings of gold. And Eros is
the same.
Then there's Iris—just like a timorous dove,
that's what Homer says.
EUELPIDES:
But what if Zeus
lets his thunder peal, then
fires down on us
his lightning bolt—that's got wings as well.
PISTHETAIROS:
[ignoring Euelpides] Now, if men in their
stupidity
770
think nothing of you and keep worshipping
Olympian gods, then a large
cloud of birds,
of rooks and sparrows, must
attack their farms,
devouring all the seed. And as
they starve,
let Demeter then dole out grain
to
them.
[580]
EUELPIDES:
She won't be willing to do that, by Zeus.
She'll make excuses—as
you'll see.
PISTHETAIROS:
Then as a test,
the ravens can peck out their
livestock's eyes,
the ones that pull the ploughs
to work the land,
and other creatures, too. Let
Apollo
780
make them better—he's the god of healing.
That's why he gets paid.
EUELPIDES:
But you can't do this
'til I've sold my two
little oxen first.
PISTHETAIROS:
But if they think of you as god, as life,
as Earth, as Kronos and
Poseidon, too,
then all good things will come
to them.
CHORUS
LEADER:
Tell me
what these good things are.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, for starters,
locusts won't eat the
blossoms on their vines.
The owls and kestrels in just
one platoon
will rid them of those pests.
Mites and gall wasps
790 [590]
won't devour the figs.
One troop of thrushes
will eradicate them one and
all.
CHORUS
LEADER: But how will we make people wealthy?
That's what they mostly want.
PISTHETAIROS:
When people come
petitioning your shrines, the
birds can show
the mining sites that pay. They'll
tell the priest
the profitable routes for
trade. That way
no captain of a ship will be
wiped out.
CHORUS LEADER: Why won't those captains come to grief?
PISTHETAIROS:
They'll always ask the birds about the trip.
800
Their seer will say,
"A
storm is on the way.
Don’t sail just yet" or
"Now’s
the time to sail—
you’ll turn a tidy profit."
EUELPIDES:
Hey, that's for me—
I'll buy a merchant ship and
take command.
I won't be staying with you.
PISTHETAIROS:
Birds can show men
the silver treasures of their
ancestors,
buried in the ground so long
ago.
For birds know where these are.
Men always say,
[600]
"No one knows where my
treasure lies, no one,
except perhaps some bird."
EUELPIDES:
I'll sell my
boat.
810
I'll buy a spade and dig
up tons of gold.
CHORUS
LEADER: How will we provide for human health?
Such things dwell with the
gods.
PISTHETAIROS:
If they're doing well,
is that not giving them good
health?
EUELPIDES:
You're right.
A man whose business isn't
very sound
is never medically well.
CHORUS
LEADER:
All right,
but how will they get old? That's
something, too,
Olympian gods bestow. Must they
die young?
PISTHETAIROS:
No, no, by god. The birds will add on years,
three hundred more.
CHORUS LEADER: And where will those come from? 820
PISTHETAIROS:
From the birds' supply. You know the saying,
"Five human lifetimes lives
the cawing crow."*
EUELPIDES:
My word, these birds are much more qualified
[610]
to govern us than Zeus.
PISTHETAIROS:
Far better qualified!
First, we don’t have to build
them holy shrines,
made out of stone, or put up
golden doors
to decorate their sanctuaries. They live
beneath the bushes and young
growing trees.
As for the prouder birds, an
olive grove
will be their temple. When we
sacrifice,
830
no need to go to Ammon or to Delphi—
we'll just stand among
arbutus
trees
[620]
or oleasters with an
offering—
barley grains or wheat—uttering our prayers,
our arms outstretched, so
from them we receive
our share of benefits. And
these we'll gain
by throwing them a few handfuls
of grain.
CHORUS
LEADER: Old man, how much you've been transformed for me—
From my worst enemy into my
friend,
my dearest friend. These
strategies of yours—
840
I'll not abandon them,
not willingly.
CHORUS:
The words you've said make us rejoice—
and so we'll swear with just
one voice
an oath that if you stand with
me—
[630]
our thoughts and aims in
unity—
honest, pious, just,
sincere,
to go against the gods up
there,
if we're both singing
the same song
the gods won't have my
sceptre long.
CHORUS
LEADER: Whatever can be done with force alone
850
we're ready to take on—what requires brains
or thinking through, all that
stuff's up to you.
PISTHETAIROS:
That's right, by Zeus. No time for dozing
now,
[640]
or entertaining doubts,
like Nikias.*
No—let’s
get up and at it fast.
TEREUS:
But first, you must come in this nest of mine,
these sticks and twigs
assembled here. So now,
both of you, tell us your
names.
PISTHETAIROS:
That’s easy.
My name's Pisthetairos.
TEREUS: And this man here?
EUELPIDES: I'm Euelpides, from Crioa. 860
TEREUS: Welcome both of you!
PISTHETAIROS and EUELPIDES: Thanks very much.
TEREUS: Won't you come in?
PISTHETAIROS:
Let's go. But you go first—
show us the way.
TEREUS: Come on, then.
[Tereus enters his house]
PISTHETAIROS:
[holding back, calling into the house] But . . . it's
strange . . .
Come back a minute.
[Tereus reappears at the door]
Look, tell us both
how me and him can share the
place with you
when you can fly but we're
not able
to.
[650]
TEREUS: I don't see any problem there.
PISTHETAIROS:
Maybe,
but in Aesop's fables there's a
story told
about some fox who hung
around an eagle,
with unfortunate results.
TEREUS:
Don't be
afraid.
870
We have a little root you nibble on—
and then you'll grow some
wings.
PISTHETAIROS:
All right then,
let's go. [To the slaves]
Manodorus, Xanthias,
bring in our mattresses.
CHORUS
LEADER: [to Tereus]
Hold on a second—
I'm calling you.
TEREUS: Why are you calling me?
CHORUS
LEADER: Take those two men in—give 'em a good meal.
But bring your tuneful
nightingale out here,
who with the Muses sings
such charming songs—
leave her with us so we
can play together.
[660]
PISTHETAIROS:
Yes, by god—agree to their
request.
880
Bring
out your little birdie in the reeds.
EUELPIDES:
For gods' sake, bring her out, so we can see
this lovely nightingale of
yours.
TEREUS:
If that's what you both want, it must be done.
[calling inside]
Come here, Procne. Our guests are calling you.
[Enter Procne from the house. She has a nightingale’s head and wings but the body of a young woman. She's wearing gold jewellery]
PISTHETAIROS:
Holy Zeus, that's one gorgeous little bird!
What a tender chick!
EUELPIDES:
How I'd love to help
that birdie
spread her legs, if you
catch my drift.
PISTHETAIROS:
Look at that—
all the gold she's wearing—just like a
girl.
[670]
EUELPIDES: What I'd like to do right now is kiss her. 890
PISTHETAIROS:
You idiot—look at that beak she's got,
a pair of skewers.
EUELPIDES:
All right, by god,
we'll treat her like an
egg—peel
off the shell,
take it clean off her head, and
then we’ll kiss her.
TEREUS: Let's get inside.
PISTHETAIROS: You lead us in—good luck to all!
[Pisthetairos, Euelpides, Tereus, Xanthias, and Manodorus enter the house]
CHORUS:
[singing to Procne]
Ah, my tawny throated love,
of all the birds that fly above
you're dearest to my heart
your sweet melodious voice
in my song plays its part—
900
my lovely Nightingale,
you've
come,
[680]
you've come.
And now you're here with me.
Pour forth your melody.
Pipe out the lovely sounds of spring,
a prelude to my rhythmic speech
in every melody you sing.
[Procne plays on the flute for a few moments as the Chorus Leader prepares to address the audience directly. He steps forward getting close to the spectators]
CHORUS
LEADER:
Come now, you men out there,
who live such dark, sad lives—
you're frail, just like a
race of leaves—you're shaped from
clay,
910
you tribes of
insubstantial shadows without wings,
you creatures of a day,
unhappy mortal men,
you figures from a dream,
now turn your minds to us,
the eternal, deathless,
air-borne, ageless birds,
whose wisdom never dies,
so you may hear from us
the truth about celestial
things, about the birds—
[690]
how they sprang into
being, how the gods arose,
how rivers, Chaos, and
dark Erebus were formed*—
about all this you’ll
learn the truth. And so from me
tell Prodicus in future to
depart.* At the start,
920
there was Chaos, and
Night, and pitch-black Erebus,
and spacious Tartarus.
There was no earth, no heaven,
no atmosphere. Then in the
wide womb of Erebus,
that boundless space,
black-winged Night, first creature born,
made pregnant by the wind,
once laid an egg. It hatched,
when seasons came around,
and out of it sprang Love—
the source of all desire,
on his back the glitter
of his golden wings, just
like the swirling whirlwind.
In broad Tartarus, Love
had sex with murky Chaos.
From them our race was
born—our first glimpse of the
light.
930
Before that there was no
immortal race at all,
not before Love mixed all
things up. But once they'd
bred
[700]
and blended in with one
another, Heaven was born,
Ocean and Earth—and all that clan of deathless gods.
Thus, we're by far the oldest
of all blessed ones,
for we are born from Love.
There's lots of proof for this.
We fly around the place,
assisting those in love—
the handsome lads who
swear they'll never bend for sex,
but who, as their young
charms come to an end, agree
to let male lovers bugger them, thanks to the birds,
940
our power as gifts—one
man gives a porphyrion,
another man a
quail, a third one gives a goose,
and yet another
offers up a Persian Fowl.*
All mortals'
greatest benefits come from us birds.
The first is this: we make the season known—springtime,
winter, autumn—it's time to sow, as soon as Crane
migrates to Lybia with all that noise. He
tells
[710]
the master mariner
to hang his rudder up
and go to sleep
awhile. He tells Orestes, too,
to weave himself a
winter cloak, so he won't
freeze
950
when he sets out again to rip off people's clothes.*
Then after that the Kite appears, to let you know
another season's here—it's time to shear the sheep.
Then Swallow comes. Now you should sell your winter cloak
and get yourself a light one. So we’re your Ammon,
Delphi and Dodona—we're your Apollo, too.*
See how, in all your business, you first look to birds—
when you trade, buy goods, or when a man gets married.
Whatever you think matters in a prophecy,
you label that a bird—to you, Rumour's a
bird;
960
[720]
you say a sneeze or
a chance meeting is a bird,
a sound's a bird,
a servant's a bird—and so's an ass.
It's clear you look on us as your Apollo.
CHORUS:
So you ought to make gods of your birds,
your muses prophetic, whose words
all year round you’ve got,
unless it's too hot.
Your questions will always be heard.
And we won't run away to a cloud
and sit there like Zeus, who's so proud—
970
we're ready to
give,
hang out where you live,
and be there for you in the crowd.
CHORUS
LEADER: Yes, to you, your children, and their children,
too,
[730]
we'll grant wealth and health, good life, and happiness,
peace, youth, laughter, dances, festivals of song—
and birds' milk, too—so much, you’ll find yourself worn
out
with our fine gifts—yes, that's how rich you'll be.
CHORUS:
Oh woodland Muse
Tio-tio-tio-tiotinx
980
my muse of varied artful song
on trees and from high mountain
peaks
[740]
tio-tio-tio-tiotinx
to your notes I sing along
in my leafy ash tree seat.
tio-tio-tio-tiontinx
From my tawny throat I fling
my sacred melodies to Pan.
In holy dance I chant and sing
our mother from the mountain land.
990
Toto-toto-toto-toto-toto-totinx
Here Phrynichus would always
sip
[750]
ambrosial nectar from our tone
to make sweet music of his own.
tio-tio-tio-tiotinx.
CHORUS
LEADER: If there's someone out there in the audience
who'd like to spend his
future life among the birds
enjoying himself, he should
come to us. Here, you see,
whatever is considered shameful
by your laws,
is all just fine among us
birds. Consider this—
1000
if your tradition says one
shouldn't beat one's dad,
up here with us it's all
right if some young bird
goes at his father, hits him,
cries, "You wanna fight?
Then put up your spur!" If
out there among you
all
[760]
there is, by chance, a
tattooed slave who's run away,
we'll call him a spotted
francolin. Or else,
if someone happens to be
Phrygian, as pure
as Spintharos, he'll be a
Philemon-bred finch.
If he's like Execestides, a
Carian slave,
let him act the Cuckoo—steal his kin from us—
1010
some group of citizens
will claim him soon enough.
And if the son of Peisias
still has in mind
betraying our city gates
to worthless men,
let him become his father's
little partridge cock—
for us there's nothing wrong
with crafty partridge stock.
CHORUS:
Tio-tio-tio-tio-tinx-
That's how the swans
[770]
massed in a crowd
with rustling wings
once raised
aloud
1020
Apollo's hymn.
Tio-tio-tio-tio-tinx
They sat in rows
on river banks
where Hebros flows.
Tio-tio-tio-tio-tinx
Their song then rose
through cloud and air—
it cast its spell
on mottled
tribes
1030
of wild beasts there—
the silent sky
calmed down the sea.
Toto-toto-toto-toto-totinx.
Olympus rang—
[780]
amazement seized
its lords and kings.
Then Muses there
and Graces, too,
voiced their response—
1040
Olympus sang.
Tio-tio-tio-tio-tiotinx.
CHORUS
LEADER: There's nothing sweeter or better than growing wings.
If any of you members of the
audience
had wings, well, if you were
feeling bored or hungry
with these tragic choruses, you
could fly away,
go home for dinner, and then,
once you'd had enough,
fly back to us again. Or if, by
any chance,
a Patrocleides sits out there
among you all,
[790]
dying to shit, he wouldn't
have to risk a fart
1050
in his own pants—he could fly off and let 'er rip,
take a deep breath, and fly
back down again.
If it should be the case that
one of you out there
is having an affair, and you
observe her husband
sitting here, in seats reserved
for Council men,
well, once again, you could fly
off and fuck the wife,
then fly back from her place
and take your seat once more.
Don’t you see how having
wings to fly beats everything?
Just look at Diitrephes—the only wings he had
were handles on his flasks of
wine, but nonetheless,
1060
they chose him to lead a
squad of cavalry,
then for a full command,
so now, from being nobody,
he carries out our great
affairs—he's now
become
[800]
a tawny civic horse-cock.*
[Enter Pisthetairos and Euelpides from Tereus’ house. They now have wings on and feathers on their heads instead of hair}
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, that's that. By Zeus,
I've never seen a more
ridiculous sight!
EUELPIDES: What are you laughing at?
PISTHETAIROS:
At your feathers.
Have you any idea what you look
like—
what you most resemble with
those feathers on?
A goose painted by some cheap
artiste!
EUELPIDES:
And you look like a blackbird—one whose
hair
1070
has just been cut using a barber’s bowl.
PISTHETAIROS:
People will use us as metaphors—
as Aeschlyus would say, "We're
shot by feathers
not from someone else but of
our very own."
CHORUS LEADER: All right, then. What do we now need to do?
PISTHETAIROS:
First, we have to name our city, something
fine and grand. Then after that
we sacrifice
[810]
an offering to the gods.
EUELPIDES: That's my view, too.
CHORUS LEADER: So what name shall we give our city?
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, do you want to use that mighty
name
1080
from Lacedaimon—shall we call it Sparta?
EUELPIDES:
By Hercules, would I use that name Sparta
for my city? No. I wouldn't
even try
esparto grass to make my bed,
not if
I could use cords of linen.*
PISTHETAIROS:
All right then, what name
shall we provide?
CHORUS
LEADER:
Some name from around here—
to do with clouds, with high
places full of air,
something really extra grand.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, then,
how do you like this:
Cloudcuckooland?
CHORUS
LEADER: Yes! That's good! You’ve come up with a name
1090 [820]
that's really wonderful—it's great!
EUELPIDES:
Hang on,
is this Cloudcuckooland the
very spot
where Theogenes keeps lots of
money,
and Aeschines hides all his
assets?*
PISTHETAIROS:
It's even more than that—it's Phlegra Plain,
the place where gods beat up on
all the giants
in a bragging match.*
EUELPIDES:
This fine metropolis!
Oh, what a glittering thing
this city is!
Now who should be the city’s
guardian god?
Who gets to wear the sacred
robes we
weave?
1100
PISTHETAIROS: Why not let Athena do the guarding?
EUELPIDES:
But how can we have a finely ordered state
where a female goddess stands
there fully
armed,
[830]
while Cleisthenes still fondles weaving shuttles.*
PISTHETAIROS: Well, who will hold our city’s strong Storkade?
CHORUS
LEADER: A bird among us of a Persian breed—
it's said to be the fiercest
anywhere
of all the war god's chicks.
EUELPIDES:
Some princely cocks?
They're just the gods to live
among the rocks!
PISTHETAIROS:
[to Euelpides]
Come now, you must move up into
the
air,
1110
and help the ones who’re building up the wall—
hoist rubble for 'em, strip
and mix the mortar,
haul up the hod, and then fall
off the
ladder.
[840]
Put guards in place, and
keep all fires concealed.
Make your inspection
rounds holding the bell.*
Go to sleep up there. Then
send out heralds—
one to gods above, one
down to men below.
And then come back from
there to me.
EUELPIDES:
And you?
You'll stay here? Well, to
hell with you . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
Hey, my friend,
you should go where I send you—without
you
1120
none of that work I mentioned will get done.
We need a sacrifice to these
new gods.
I'll call a priest to
organize the show.
[Euelpides exits. Pisthetairos calls to the slaves through the doors of Tereus’ house]
You, boy, pick up the basket, and you,
my lad, grab up the holy
water.
[850]
[Pisthetairos
enters the house. As the Chorus sings, the slaves emerge and prepare for the
sacrifice. The Chorus is accompanied by a raven playing the pipes]
CHORUS: I think it's
good and I agree,
your notions here are fine with me,
a great big march with dancing throngs
and to the gods send holy songs,
and then their benefits to
keep
1130
we'll sacrifice a baby
sheep—
let go our cry, the Pythian shout,
while Chaeris plays our chorus out.
[The Raven plays erratically on the pipe. Pisthetairos comes out of the house. He brings a priest with him who is leading a small scrawny goat for the sacrifice]
PISTHETAIROS:
[to the Raven] Stop blowing all that noise! By Hercules,
what's this? I’ve seen some
strange things, heaven
knows,
[860]
but never this—a raven with a pipe
shoved up his nose. Come
on, priest, work your spell,
and sacrifice to these new
gods as well.
PRIEST: I'll do it. But where's the basket-bearing boy?
[The slave appears with the basket]
Let us now pray to Hestia of the birds,*
1140
and to the Kite that watches o'er the hearth,
to all Olympian birds and
birdesses . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
[to himself] O Hawk of Sunium, all hail to you,
Lord of the Sea . . .
PRIEST:
And to the Pythian Swan of Delos—
let's pray to Leto, mother of
the
quail
[870]
to Artemis the Goldfinch .
. .
PISTHETAIROS:
Ha! No more goddess
of Colaenis now, but goldfinch
Artemis . . .
PRIEST:
. . . to Sabazdios, Phrygian frigate bird,
to the great ostrich mother of
the
gods
1150
and of all men . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
. . . to Cybele, our ostrich queen,
mother of Cleocritos* . . .
PRIEST:
. . . may they give
to all Cloudcuckooites
security,
good health, as well—and to the Chians, too.*
PISTHETAIROS:
I do like that—the way those
Chians
[880]
always
get tacked on
everywhere—
PRIEST:
. . . to Hero birds, and to their chicks,
to Porphyrions and
Pelicans,
both white and grey, to
Raptor-birds and Pheasants,
Peacocks and Warblers . .
.
[The Priest starts to get carried away]
. . . Ospreys and Teals
Herons and Gannets, Terns,
small Tits, big Tits, and . .
.
1160
PISTHETAIROS:
[interrupting]
Hold on, dammit—stop calling all these birds.
You idiot! In what sort of
sacrifice
[890]
does
one call for ospreys and for vultures?
Don't you see—one kite could snatch this goat,
then carry it away? Get
out of here,
you and your garlands,
too. I'll do it myself—
I'll offer up this beast
all on my own.
[Pisthetairos pushes the Priest away. Exit Priest]
CHORUS:
Now once again I have to sing
a song to purify you all,
a holy sacred melody.
1170
The Blessed Ones I have to call—
but if you're in a mood to eat
we just need one and not a
score
for here our sacrificial
meat
[900]
is horns and hair, and nothing more.
PISTHETAIROS:
Let us pray while we make sacrifice
to our feathery gods . . . [raises
his eyes to sky and shuts his eyes]
[A poet suddenly bursts on the scene reciting his verses as he enters]
POET:
[reciting] O Muse, in your songs sing the renown
of Cloudcuckooland—this happy town . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
Where'd this thing come from?
Tell me—who are
you?
1180
POET:
Me? I'm a sweet tongued warbler of the words—
a nimble servant of the
Muse, as Homer
says.
[910]
PISTHETAIROS: You're a slave and wear your hair that long?
POET:
No, but all poets of dramatic songs
are nimble servants of the
Muse, as Homer says.
PISTHETAIROS:
No doubt that's why your nimble cloak's so thin.
But, oh poet, why has thou
come hither?
POET:
I've been making up all sorts of splendid songs
to celebrate your fine
Cloudcuckoolands—
dithyrambs and virgin
songs and other
tunes
1190
after the style of that Simonides.*
PISTHETAIROS: When did you compose these tunes? Some time ago? [920]
POET:
Oh, long long ago—yes, I've been singing
the glory of this town for
years.
PISTHETAIROS:
Look here—
I've just been making
sacrifice today—
the day our city gets its
name. What's more,
it's only now, as with a
new-born child,
I’ve given it that name.
POET:
Ah yes, but Muses' words are swift indeed—
like twinkling hooves on
rapid steeds.
So thou, oh father, first
of Aetna’s
kings,
1200
whose name means lots of holy things,
present me something from thy
grace
whate'er you wish, just nod
your face.*
[930]
PISTHETAIROS:
This fellow here is going to give us trouble—
unless we can escape by giving
something.
[Calling one of the slaves]
You there with the tunic and the jerkin on.
Strip off the leather jerkin.
Give it up
to this master poet. Take this jerkin.
You look as if you're really
freezing cold.
POET:
The darling Muse accepts the gift
1210
and not unwillingly—
But now your wit should get a
lift
from Pindar’s words which . .
.
PISTHETAIROS: This fellow's never going to go away! [940]
POET:
[making up a quotation] "Out there amid nomadic Scythians,
he wanders from the host
in all his shame,
he who has no woven
garment shuttle-made—
a jerkin on, but no tunic
to his name."
I speak so you can
understand.
PISTHETAIROS:
Yes, I get it—you want the tunic,
too.
1220
[To the slave] Take it off. We must assist our poets.
Take it and get out.
POET:
I'm on my way—
But as I go I'll still
make songs like these
in honour of your city—
"O thou sitting on a
golden throne,
[950]
sing to celebrate that shivering, quivering land.
I walked its snow-swept
fruitful plains . . ."
[At this point Pisthetairos has had enough. He grabs the poet and throws him into the wings]
POET: [as he exits] Aaaaiiiii!
PISTHETAIROS:
[calling after him]
Well, by Zeus, at least you've
now put behind
the cold, since you've
got that little tunic on!
God knows, that's a
problem I’d not thought about—
1230
he learned about our city here so fast.
[resuming the sacrifice]
Come, boy, pick up the holy water
and walk around again. Let
everyone
observe a sacred holy silence
now . . .
[Enter an Oracle Monger, quickly interrupting the ceremony. He is carrying a scroll]
ORACLE MONGER: Don't sacrifice that goat!
PISTHETAIROS: What? Who are you?
ORACLE MONGER: Who am I? I’m an oracular interpreter.
PISTHETAIROS: To hell with you! [960]
ORACLE
MONGER:
Now, now, my dear good man,
don't disparage things
divine. You should know
there's an oracle of
Bacis which speaks
of your Cloudcuckooland—it's
pertinent.
1240
PISTHETAIROS:
Then how come you didn't talk to me
about this prophecy some
time before
I set my city here?
ORACLE
MONGER:
I could not do that—
powers divine held me in check.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, I guess
there's nothing wrong in
listening to it now.
ORACLE
MONGER [unrolling the scroll and reading from it]
"Once grey crows and wolves
shall live together
in that space between
Corinth and Sicyon . . ."
PISTHETAIROS: What my connection to Corinthians?
ORACLE
MONGER: Its Bacis’ cryptic way of saying "air."
[970]
"First sacrifice to
Pandora a white-fleeced ram.
1250
Whoever first comes to prophesy my words,
let him receive a brand new
cloak and sandals."
PISTHETAIROS: Are sandals in there, too?
ORACLE
MONGER: [showing the scroll]
Consult the book.
"Give him the bowl, fill his
hands full with offal . . ."
PISTHETAIROS: The entrails? Does it says that in there?
ORACLE
MONGER: Consult the book. "Inspired youth,
if thou dost complete what
here I do command,
thou shalt become an eagle
in the clouds—if not,
if thou will not give them
me, you’ll ne’er become
1260
an eagle, or a turtle dove, or woodpecker."
PISTHETAIROS: That’s all in there, as well?
ORACLE MONGER: Consult the book. [980]
PISTHETAIROS:
[pulling out a sheet of paper from his pants]
Your oracle is not at all like
this one—
Apollo’s very words. I them
wrote down.
"When an impostor comes
without an invitation—
a cheating rogue—and pesters men at sacrifice,
so keen is he to taste the
inner parts, well then,
he must be beaten hard
between the ribs . . ."
ORACLE MONGER: I don't think you’re reading that.
PISTHETAIROS:
Consult the book.
"Do not spare him, even if he's
way up there,
1270
an eagle in the clouds, or if he's Lampon
or great Diopeithes in the
flesh."*
ORACLE MONGER: That’s not in there, is it?
PISTHETAIROS:
Consult the book.
Now, get out! To hell with you
. . .
{Pisthetairos beats the Oracle Monger off stage, hitting him with the scroll]
ORACLE MONGER: Ooooh . . . poor me! [Exit] [990]
PISTHETAIROS: Run off and do your soothsaying somewhere else!
[Enter Meton, a very effeminate man, carrying various surveying instruments, and wearing soft leather buskin boots]*
METON: I have come here among you all . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
Here's more trouble.
And what have you come
here to do? Your scheme—
what's it look like?
What do you have in mind?
Why hike up here in
buskin?
METON:
I intend
to measure out the air for you—dividing
it
1280
in surveyed lots.
PISTHETAIROS:
For heaven's sake,
who are you?
METON:
[shocked]
Who am I? I'm Meton—
famous throughout Greece and
Colonus.*
PISTHETAIROS: What are these things you’ve got?
METON:
Rods to measure air.
You see, the air is, in its
totality,
[1000]
shaped like a domed pot cover . . . Thus . . . and so,
from up above I'll lay my
ruler . . . it bends . . . thus . . .
set my compass inside there . .
. You see?
PISTHETAIROS: I don't get it.
METON:
With this straight ruler here
I measure this, so that your
circle
here
1290
becomes a square—and right in the middle there
we have a market place, with
straight highways
proceeding to the centre, like
a star,
which, although circular,
shines forth straight beams
in all directions . . . Thus .
. .
PISTHETAIROS:
This man's a Thales*
Now, Meton . . .
METON: What?
PISTHETAIROS:
You know I love you—
[1010]
so do as I say and head
out of town.
METON: Am I in peril?
PISTHETAIROS:
It's like in Sparta—
they're kicking strangers out—lots of trouble—
plenty of beatings on the way
through
town.
1300
METON: You mean a revolution?
PISTHETAIROS: God no, not that.
METON: Then what?
PISTHETAIROS:
They've reached a firm decision—
it was unanimous—to punch out every quack.
METON: I think I'd best be off.
PISTHETAIROS:
You should, by god,
although you may not be in time—the blows
are coming thick and fast . . .
[Pisthetairos starts hitting Meton]
METON: [running off] Oh dear me . . . I'm in a pickle.
[Exit Meton. Pisthetairos yells after him]
PISTHETAIROS:
Didn't I say that some time ago?
Go somewhere else and do your
measuring!
[1020]
[Enter an Athenian Commissioner. He is carrying voting urns. He is dressed in an extravagantly official costume]*
COMMISSIONER: Where are your honorary governors?
PISTHETAIROS: Who is this man—a Sardanapallos?* 1310
COMMISSIONER:
I have come here to Cloudcuckooland
as your Commissioner—I was picked by lot.
PISTHETAIROS: As Commissioner? Who sent you here?
COMMISSIONER: Some dreadful paper from that Teleas.*
PISTHETAIROS:
How'd you like to receive your salary
and leave, without doing
anything?
COMMISSIONER:
By god,
that would be nice. I should be
staying at home
for the assembly. I've been
doing some work
on Pharnakes' behalf.*
PISTHETAIROS:
Then take your fee
and go. Here's what you get .
. . [strikes him]
COMMISSIONER: What was that? 1320
PISTHETAIROS: A motion on behalf of Pharnakes. [1030]
[Pisthetairos strikes him again]
COMMISSIONER:
I call on witnesses—he's hitting me—
He can't do that—I'm a Commissioner!
[Exit the Commissioner, on the run. Pisthetairos chases him]
PISTHETAIROS: Piss off! And take your voting urns with you!
Don't you find it weird?
Already they've sent out
Commissioners to oversee the
city,
before we've made the gods a
sacrifice.
[Enter a Statute-Seller reading from a long scroll]
STATUTE
SELLER: "If a resident of Cloudcuckooland
should wrong a citizen of
Athens . . ."
PISTHETAIROS: Here come scrolls again—what's the trouble now? 1330
STATUE
SELLER: I'm a statute seller—and I've come here
to sell you brand-new laws.
PISTHETAIROS: What laws?
STATUTE
SELLER:
Like this—
"Residents of Cloudcuckooland
must
use
[1040]
the same weights and
measures and currency
as those in Olophyxia."*
PISTHETAIROS:
[kicking him in the bum]
Soon enough
you'll use them on your ass,
you Fix-your-Holean!!
STATUTE SELLER: What's up with you?
PISTHETAIROS:
Take your laws and shove off!
Today I'll give you laws you
really feel!
[Statute Seller runs off. The Commissioner enters from the other side, behind Pisthetairos]
COMMISSIONER:
[reading from a paper]
"I summon Pisthetairos to appear
in court
in April on a charge of
official outrage .
. ."
. 1340
PISTHETAIROS: [turning] Really? You again! Why are you still here?
[Pisthetairos chases the Commissioner off again. The Statute Seller then re-appears on the other side, also reading from a paper]
STATUTE
SELLER: "If anyone chases off court officers
and won't receive them as the
law decrees . .
."
[1050]
PISTHETAIROS [turning] This is getting really bad—you still here?
[Pisthetairos chases off the Statute Seller. The Commissioner re-appears on the other side of the stage]
COMMISSIONER:
I'll ruin you! I'll take you to court—
ten thousand drachmas you'll
. . .
PISTHETAIROS:
[turning and chasing the Commissioner off stage]
And I'll throw out those
voting urns of yours!
STATUTE
SELLER [reappearing]
Have you any memory of those
evenings
when you used to shit on public
pillars
where our laws are
carved?
1350
[The Statute Seller turns his back on Pisthetairos, lifts up his tunic, and farts at him]
PISTHETAIROS:
[reacting to the smell]
Oh god! Someone grab him.
[The slaves try to catch the Statute Seller but he runs off. Pisthetairos calls after him]
Not going to stick
around?
[to slaves] Let's get out of here—and fast. Go inside.
We'll sacrifice the goat to the gods in there.
[Pisthetairos and the slaves to inside the house]
CHORUS:
All mortal men commencing on this day
at every shrine will sacrifice
to me,
from now on offering me the
prayers they
say,
[1060]
for I control them all and everything I see.
I watch the entire world, and I
protect
the growing crops, for I have
power to kill
the progeny of all the world's
insects,
1360
whose all-devouring jaws
would eat their fill
of what bursts out from
seeds on ground below,
or fruit above for those
who lodge in trees.
I kill the ones who, as
the greatest foe,
in sweet-smelling gardens
cause great injuries
All living beasts that
bite and crawl
are killed—my
wings destroy them
all.
[1070]
CHORUS
LEADER: This public notice has been proclaimed today:
the man who kills Diagoras the
Melian
will receive one talent—and if one of
you
1370
assassinates some tyrant long since dead and gone,
he, too, will get one talent.
So now, the birds, as well,
wish to make the same
announcement here. Any one
who kills Philocrates the
Sparrowman will get
one talent—and if he brings him in alive,
he’ll get four.* That man
strings finches up together,
then sells 'em—a single obol gets you seven.
He injures thrushes by
inflating them with air
[1080]
then puts them on display. And he stuff feathers
up the blackbird's nose. He
captures pigeons,
too,
1380
keeps them locked up, and forces them to work for him,
tied up as decoy birds,
underneath his nets.
We wish to make this known to
you. If anyone
is keeping birds in cages in
your courtyards,
we tell you, "Let them go."
If you don't obey,
you, in your turn, will be
arrested by the birds,
tied up and forced to work
as decoys where we live.
CHORUS: Oh happy tribes
of feathered birds—
we never
need
1390
a winter cloak.
[1090]
In summer days
the sun's far rays
don’t injure us.
I live at ease
among the leaves
in flowery fields.
In love with sun
cicadas sing
through noonday
heat
1400
their sharp-toned song
divinely sweet.
In winter caves
and hollow spots
I play all day
with mountain nymphs.
In spring we eat
white myrtle buds,
our virgin treat,
in garden places
1410
of the
Graces.
[1100]
CHORUS
LEADER: We want to speak to all the judges here
about our victory—the splendid things
we'll give them if their
verdict goes our way—
how they'll get much
lovelier gifts than those
which Alexander got.* And
first of all,
what every judge is really keen to have,
some owls of Laureium who'll
never leave.*
They’ll nest inside your
homes, hatch in your purse,
and always breed small
silver change. And
then,
1420
as well as this, you’ll live in temple-homes.
The birds will make your
roof tops
eagle-style,
[1110]
with pediments.* If you hold some office,
a minor post, and wish to get
rich quick,
we'll set a sharp-beaked
falcon in your hands.
And if you need to eat,
then we'll dispatch
a bird's crop, where it
keep its stored-up food.
If you don't vote for
us, you should prepare
some little metal plates
to guard your head.
You'll need to wear
them, just like statues do.
1430
For those of you without that head plate
on,
when you dress up in fine white
brand-new clothes,
the birds will crap on as a
punishment.
[Enter Pisthetairos from the house]
PISTHETAIROS:
You birds, we've made a splendid sacrifice.
But why is there still no
messenger
arriving from the walls to
bring us
news
[1120]
of what's going on up there? Ah, here comes one,
panting as if he'd run
across that stream
at Elis where Olympian
athletes race.
[Enter
First Messenger, out of breath]
FIRST MESSENGER: [he
doubles up and can hardly speak]
Where is . . . Where is he . .
. where . . . where is . .
.
1440
where . . . where . . . where . . . our governor Pisthetairos?
PISTHETAIROS: I'm here.
FIRST MESSENGER: The building of your wall . . . it's done.
PISTHETAIROS: That's great news.
FIRST
MESSENGER:
The result—the best there is . . .
the most magnificent . . . so
wide across . . .
that Proxenides of Braggadocio
and Theogenes could drive two
chariots
in opposite directions past
each other
along the top, with giant
horses yoked,
bigger than that wooden horse at Troy.
PISTHETAIROS: [genuinely surprised] By Hercules!
FIRST
MESSENGER:
I measured it myself—
1450
[1130]
its height—around six hundred feet.
PISTHETAIROS:
Wow!
By Poseidon, that's some
height! Who built the wall
as high as that?
FIRST
MESSENGER:
The birds—nobody else.
No Egyptian bore the bricks—no mason,
no carpenter was there. They
worked by hand—
I was amazed. Thirty thousand
cranes flew in
from Lybia—they brought foundation stones
they'd swallowed down. The
corn crakes chipped away
to form the proper shapes.
Ten thousand storks
brought bricks. Lapwings
and other river birds
1460
fetched water up into the air from down
below.
[1140]
PISTHETAIROS: Who hauled the mortar up there for them?
FIRST
MESSENGER:
Herons—
they carried hods.
PISTHETAIROS: How'd they load those hods?
FIRST
MESSENGER: My dear man, that was the cleverest thing of all.
Geese shoved their feet into
the muck and slid them,
just like shovels, then flicked
it in the hods.
PISTHETAIROS: Is there anything we can't do with our feet?
FIRST
MESSENGER: Then, by god, the ducks, with slings attached
around their waists, set up the
bricks. Behind them
flew the swallows, like young
apprentice boys,
1470 [1150]
with trowels—they carried mortar in their mouths.
PISTHETAIROS:
Why should we hire wage labour any more?
Go on—who finished off the woodwork on the
wall?
FIRST
MESSENGER: The most skilled craftsmen-birds of all of 'em—
woodpeckers. They pecked
away to make the gates—
the noise those peckers made—an arsenal!
Now the whole thing has gates.
They’re bolted shut
and guarded on all sides.
Sentries make rounds,
patrolling with their bells,
and everywhere
[1160]
troops are in position,
with signal fires
1480
on every tower. But I must
go now—
I need to wash. You'll
have to do the rest.
[Exit First Messenger]
CHORUS
LEADER: What's up with you? Aren’t you astonished
to hear the wall's been
finished up so fast?
PISTHETAIROS:
Yes, by gods, I am. It is amazing!
To me it sounds just like some
made-up lie.
But here comes a guard from
there—he'll bring news
to us down here of what's
going on up top.
He face looks like a dancing
warrior's.
[Enter the Second Messenger in a great panic and out of breath]
SECOND MESSENGER: Hey . . . hey . . . Help . . . hey you . . . help! 1490 [1170]
PISTHETAIROS: What's going on?
SECOND
MESSENGER:
We suffered something really bad . . .
one of the gods from Zeus has
just got through,
flown past the gates into the
air, slipping by
the jackdaw sentinels on
daytime watch.
PISTHETAIROS:
That's bad! A bold and dangerous action.
Which god was it?
SECOND
MESSENGER:
We're not sure. He had wings—
we do know that.
PISTHETAIROS:
You should have sent patrols
of frontier guards out after
him without delay.
SECOND
MESSENGER: We did dispatch the mounted archers—
thirty thousand falcons, all
moving out
1500 [1180]
with talons curved and ready—kestrels, buzzards,
vultures, eagles, owls—the air vibrating
with the beat and rustle of
their wings,
as they search out that god. He's
not far off—
in fact, he's here somewhere
already.
[Exit Second Messenger]
PISTHETAIROS:
We'll have to get our sling-shots out—and bows.
All you orderlies come here!
Fire away!
Strike out! Someone fetch a
sling for me!
[Xanthias
and Manodorus enter with slings and bows. The group huddles together with
weapons ready]
CHORUS: [in grand
epic style]
And now the combat starts, a
strife beyond all words,
me and the gods at war. Let
every one beware,
1510 [1190]
protect the cloud-enclosing air, which Erebus
gave birth to long ago. Make
sure no god slips through
without our catching sight of
him. Maintain your watch
on every side—already I can hear close by
the sound of beating wings from
some god in the sky.
[Enter Iris, in long billowing dress and with a pair of wings. She descends from above, suspended by a cable and hovering in mid-air flapping her wings]
PISTHETAIROS:
Hey, you—just where do you think you're
flying?
Keep still. Stay where you are.
Don’t move. Stop
running.
[1200]
Who are you? Where you
from? You've got to tell me.
Where'd you come from?
IRIS: I'm from the Olympian gods.
PISTHETAIROS:
You got a name? You look like a ship up there—
1520
the Salaminia or the
Paralos.*
IRIS: I’m fast Iris.
PISTHETAIROS: Fast as in a boat or fast as in a bitch?
IRIS: What is all this?
PISTHETAIROS:
Is there a buzzard here
who’ll fly up there to arrest
this woman?
IRIS: Arrest me? Why are you saying such rubbish?
PISTHETAIROS:
[making at attempt to hit Iris by swinging his sling]
You’re going to be very
sorry about this.
IRIS: This whole affair is most unusual.
PISTHETAIROS:
Listen, you silly old fool, what gates
did you pass through to get by
the wall?
IRIS:
What gates?
By god, I don't have the
least
idea.
1530
[1210]
PISTHETAIROS:
Listen to her—how she feigns ignorance!
Did you go past the jackdaw
generals?
You won't answer that? Well
then, where's your pass,
the one the storks give
out?
IRIS: What's wrong with you?
PISTHETAIROS:You don't have one, do you?
IRIS: Have you lost your wits?
PISTHETAIROS:
Didn't some captain of the birds up there
stick a pass on you?
IRIS:
By god no, no one up there
made a pass or shoved his stick at me, you wretch.
PISTHETAIROS:
So you just fly in here, without a word,
going through empty space and
through a city
1540
which don't belong to you?
IRIS:
What other route
are gods supposed to fly?
PISTHETAIROS:
I’ve no idea.
But, by god, not this way.
It's not
legal.
[1220]
Right now you're in breach of law. Do you know,
of all the Irises there
are around,
if you got what you most
deserve, you'd be
the one most justly seized
and sent to die.
IRIS: But I’m immortal.
PISTHETAIROS:
In spite of that,
you would have died. For it's
obvious to me
that we'd be suffering
the greatest
injury,
1550
if, while we rule all other things, you gods
do just what you like and won't
recognize
how you must, in your
turn, attend upon
those more powerful than
you. So tell me,
where are you sailing on
those wings of yours?
IRIS:
Me? I'm flying to men from father
Zeus,
[1230]
instructing them to sacrifice some sheep
to the Olympian gods on sacred
hearths—
and fill their streets with
smells of offerings.
PISTHETAIROS: Who are you talking about? Which gods? 1560
IRIS: Which gods? Why us of course—the gods in heaven.
PISTHETAIROS: And you're the gods?
IRIS: Are there any other deities?
PISTHETAIROS:
The birds are now men's gods—and to the birds
men must now sacrifice and
not, by god, to Zeus.
IRIS:
[in the grand tragic style]
Thou fool, thou fool, stir
not the awesome minds of gods,
lest Justice with the mighty
mattock of great Zeus
[1240]
destroy your race completely—and smoke-filled flames
from Licymnian lightning bolts
burn into ash
your body and your home . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
[interrupting]
Listen, woman—stop your spluttering.
Just keep still. Do you think
you're scaring off
1570
some Lydian or Phrygian with such threats?
You should know this—if Zeus keeps on annoying me,
I'll burn his home and halls
of Amphion,
reduce them all to ash
with fire eagles.
I'll send more than six
hundred birds—porphyrions
all dressed in leopard
skins, up there to heaven,
[1250]
to war on him. Once a single porphyrion
caused him distress enough.*
And as for you,
if you keep trying to piss me
off, well then,
I'll deal with Zeus'
servant Iris first—
1580
I’ll fuck your knickers off—you'd be surprised
how hard an old man's
prick like mine can be—
it's strong enough to
ram your hull three times.
IRIS: Blast you, you wretch, and your obscenities!
PISTHETAIROS: Go way! Get a move on! Shoo!
[Iris begins to move up and away]
IRIS:
My father
won't stand for insolence
like this—he'll stop you!
PISTHETAIROS:
Just go away, you silly fool! Fly
off
[1210]
and burn someone to ashes somewhere else.
[Exit Iris]
CHORUS:
On Zeus' family of gods we've shut our door—
they'll not be passing
through my city any more.
1590
Nor will men down below in future time invoke
the gods by sending them their
sacrificial smoke.
PISTHETAIROS:
Something's wrong. That messenger we sent,
the one that went to human
beings, what if
he never gets back here
again?
[1270]
[Enter First Herald, a bird, carrying a golden crown]
FIRST
HERALD: O Pisthetairos, you blessed one,
wisest and most celebrated of
all men . . .
the cleverest and happiest . .
. trebly blest . . .
[he’s run out of
adjectives] . . . Speak something to me . . .
PISTHETAIROS: What are you saying?
FIRST
HERALD: [offering Pisthetairos the golden crown]
All people, in honour of
your wisdom,
1600
crown you with this golden diadem.
PISTHETAIROS:
[putting on the crown]
I accept.
But why do people honour me so
much?
FIRST
HERALD: Oh you founder of this most famous town,
this city in the sky, do you
not know
how much respect you have among
all men,
how many men there are who love
this place?
Before you built your city in
the
air,
[1280]
all men were mad for Sparta—with long hair,
they went around half starved
and never washed,
like Socrates—and carrying knobbed
sticks.
1610
But now they've all completely changed—these
days
they're crazy for the birds.
For sheer delight
they imitate the birds in
everything.
Early in the day when they've
just got up,
like us, they all flock to feed
together,
but on their laws, browsing
legal leaflets,
nibbling their fill of all
decrees. So mad
have they become for birds that
many
men
[1290]
have had the names of
birds assigned to them.
One lame tradesman now is
called the Partridge.
1620
And Melanippus' name is
changed to Swallow,*
Opuntius the Raven with One
Eye.
Philocles becomes the Lark, and
Sheldrake
is now Teagenes’ name.
Lycurgus
has become the Ibis, Chaerephon
the Bat,
Syracosius the Jay, and Meidias
is now named the Quail—he looks like one
right after the quail flicker's tapped its head.*
They're so in
love with birds they all sing
songs
[1300]
with lines about a swallow or a duck,
1630
or goose, some kind of pigeon, or just wings,
even about some tiny bits of feather.
That what's going on down there. I tell you,
more than ten
thousand men are coming here,
demanding wings and
talons in their lives.
You've got to
find a way to get some wings
for your new
colonists and settlers.
[Exit First Herald]
PISTHETAIROS:
All right, by god, this is no time for us
to just stand around. [To a slave] You, get inside there—
fill all the crates and baskets up with
feathers.
1640
[1310]
Get on with it as fast as possible.
Let Manes haul the wings out here to me.*
I'll welcome those who come from down below.
[Xanthias and Manodoros go inside the house and start bringing out baskets of feathers]
CHORUS:
Our city soon will have a reputation
for a large and swelling population.
PISTHETAIROS: Just let our luck hold out!
CHORUS: Our city here inspires so much love . . .
PISTHETAIROS
[to Manodoros, who is bringing out a basket]
I’m telling you you've got to bring it fast!
CHORUS:
For what do we not have here up above
which any men require in their places?
1650
Desire, Wisdom, and eternal Graces—
we've got them all and what is still the best—
the happy face of
gentle peaceful Rest.
PISTHETAIROS:
[to Manes who is taking his time bringing out more baskets]
God, you’re a lazy slave—move it! Faster!
CHORUS:
Let him bring the wings in baskets on the go—
then once more run at him—give him a blow.
The lad is like a donkey—he’s that slow.
PISTHETAIROS:
[frantically sorting feathers]
Yes, that Manes is a useless slave.
CHORUS:
Now first of all you need to
sort
[1330]
these wings all out for each cohort—
1660
musical wings and wings of seers,
wings for the sea. You must be clear—
you need to look at all such things
when you give every man his wings.
[Manes comes out with a basket, again moving very slowly]
PISTHETAIROS:
[going at Manes and grabbling him]
By the kestrels, I can't stop grabbing you—
when I see how
miserably slow you are.
[Manes
twists loose and runs back into the house. A young man enters singing]
YOUNG MAN: [singing]
Oh, I wish I could an eagle be
soaring high above the barren sea,
the grey-blue ocean swell so free.
PISTHETAIROS:
It looks like our messenger told us the truth—
1670
here comes someone singing that eagle-song.
YOUNG
MAN: Damn it—there's nothing in the world as sweet
as flying . . .
<PISTHETAIROS: You've come to get some wings from us, I guess.*>
YOUNG
MAN: Yes, I'm in love with all your birdy ways—
I want to live with
you and fly. Besides,
I think your laws
are really keen.
PISTHETAIROS: What laws? The birds have many laws.
YOUNG
MAN: All of them—but I really like that one
which says it's all right for a younger bird
to beat up his old
man and strangle him.
1680
PISTHETAIROS:
Yes, by god, we think it very manly
when a bird, while still a chick, beats up his
dad.
[1350]
YOUNG MAN: That's why I want to re-locate up here—
I'd love to choke
my father, get all his stuff.
PISTHETAIROS:
But there's an ancient law among the birds—
inscribed in stone
on tablets of the storks,
"When father
stork has raised up all his young,
when they are set
to fly out of the nest,
then young storks
must, in their turn, care for him."
YOUNG
MAN: So coming here has been no use, by god,
1690
if I've now got to feed my father, too.
PISTHETAIROS:
No, no. My dear young man, since you came
here
[1360]
in all good faith, I’ll fix you up with wings
just like an orphan
bird.* And I’ll give you
some fresh advice—something I learned myself
when I was just a
lad. Don’t thump your dad.
[Pisthetairos starts dressing the boy as a bird as he says the following lines]
Take this wing here, and in your other hand
hold this spur tight. Think of this crest on top
as from a fighting cock. Then stand your guard,
go on a march, live on a soldier’s pay—
1700
and let your father live. You like to fight,
so fly away to territories in Thrace,
and do your fighting there.
YOUNG
MAN:
By Dionysus,
I think the advice you give is
good.
[1370]
I’ll do just what you say.
PISTHETAIROS:
And now, by Zeus,
you're talking sense.
[Exit Young Man. Enter Cinesias, singing and dancing very badly]*
CINESIAS:
[singing] To Olympus on high
with my wings I will fly—
On this song's path I’ll soar
and then sing a few
more . .
.
1710
PISTHETAIROS: This creature needs a whole pile of wings!
CINESIAS:
[singing] For my body and mind
know not fear, so I'll find . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
Cinesias, welcome. Let me now greet
a man as thin as bark on linden trees!
Why have you come whirling here on such lame feet?
CINESIAS:
A bird—that's what I long to
be,
[1380]
a clear-voice nightingale—that's me.
PISTHETAIROS: Stop singing—just tell me what you want to say.
CINESIAS:
I want you to give me wings then float
up,
1720
flying high into the clouds where I can pluck
wind-whirling preludes swept with snow.
PISTHETAIROS: You want to get your preludes from the clouds?
CINESIAS:
But all our skill depends upon the clouds.
Our brilliant dithyrambs are made of air—
of mist and gleaming murk and wispy wings.
You'll soon see that—once you've heard a
few.
[1390]
PISTHETAIROS: No, no—I won't.
CINESIAS:
Yes, by Hercules, you will.
For you I'll run through all the airs . . . [starts
singing]
Oh you images of
birds,
1730
who extend your wings,
who tread upon the air,
you long-necked birds . . .
PISTHETAIROS: [trying to interrupt] All right. Enough!
CINESIAS:
[ignoring Pisthetairos, continuing to sing another song]
Soaring upward as I roam.
I wander floating on the breeze . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
[looking in one of the baskets of wings]
By heaven, I'll stop these blasting winds of yours!
[Pisthetairos takes a pair of wings and starts poking Cinesias around the stage with them, tickling him]
CINESIAS:
[dodging away from Pisthetairos, giggling, and continuing to sing]
First I head along the highway going down south,
but then my body turns towards the windy north,
as I slice airy furrows where no harbour lies . .
.
1740
[1400]
[Cinesias has to stop singing because Pisthetairos is tickling him too much with the wings. He stops running off and singing. He’s somewhat out of breath]
Old man, that's a clever trick—pleasant, too—
but really clever.
PISTHETAIROS:
You mean you don't enjoy
being whisked with wings?
CINESIAS:
Is that the way you treat
the man who trains the cyclic
choruses—
the one whom tribes of men
still fight to have?*
PISTHETAIROS:
Would you like to stick around this place
to train a chorus here for
Leotrophides,*
made up of flying birds—the swallow tribe?
CINESIAS:
You're making fun of me—that's obvious.
But I won't stop here until I
get some wings
1750
and I can run through all
the airs.
[Exit Cinesias. Enter a Sycophant, singing to himself]
SYCOPHANT:
[singing] Who are these birds with mottled
wing?
[1410]
They don't appear to own a thing—
O dappled swallow with extended
wing . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
This is no minor problem we've stirred up—
here comes one more person
singing to himself.
SYCOPHANT: [singing] O long and dappled wings, I call once more . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
It seems to me his song's about his cloak—
he needs a lot of swallows to
bring in the spring.*
SYCOPHANT:
Where's the man who's handing out the wings
1760
to all who travel here?
PISTHETAIROS:
He's standing here.
But you should tell me what you
need.
SYCOPHANT:
Wings, wings.
I need wings. Don't ask me
that
again.
[1420]
PISTHETAIROS: Do you intend to fly off right away,
heading for Pellene?
SYCOPHANT:
No, not at all.
I'm a summons server for the
islands—
an informer, too . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
You're a lucky man
to have such a fine profession.
SYCOPHANT:
. . . and I hunt around
to dig up law suits. That's
why I need wings,
to roam around delivering
summonses
1770
in allied states.
PISTHETAIROS:
If you're equipped with wings,
will that make you more skilled
in serving men?
SYCOPHANT:
No. But I'd escape being hurt by pirates.
And then I could return home with
the cranes,
once I’ve swallowed many law
suits down
to serve as ballast.*
PISTHETAIROS:
Is that what you do for work?
[1430]
Tell me this—you're a strong young lad and yet
don't you slander strangers
for a living?
SYCOPHANT: What can I do? I never learned to dig.
PISTHETAIROS:
But, by god, there are other decent jobs,
1780
where a young man like you can earn his way,
more honest trades than
launching still more law suits.
SYCOPHANT:
My good man, don't keep lecturing me like this.
Give me some wings.
PISTHETAIROS:
I'm giving you some wings—
I'm doing it as I talk to you
right now.
SYCOPHANT: How can you put wings on men with words?
PISTHETAIROS: With words all men can give themselves their wings.
SYCOPHANT: All men?
PISTHETAIROS:
Have you never heard in barber shops
how fathers always talk of
their young sons—
[1440]
"It’s dreadful the way that Diitrephes’
speech
1790
has given my young lad
ambitious wings,
so now he wants to race
his chariot."
Another says "That boy of
mine has wings
and flutters over tragedies."
SYCOPHANT:
So with words
they're really given
wings?
PISTHETAIROS:
That what I said.
With words our minds are raised—a man can soar.
That's how I want to give you
wings—with words,
with useful words, so you can
change your life
and get a lawful occupation.
SYCOPHANT: But I don’t want to. [1450]
PISTHETAIROS: What will you do?
SYCOPHANT:
I'll not disgrace my folks.
1800
Informing—that's my family’s profession.
So give me now some light, fast
falcon's wings—
or kestrel's—then I can serve my papers
on those foreigners, lay the
charges here,
and fly back there again.
PISTHETAIROS:
Ah, I get it—
what you're saying is that
the case is judged
before the stranger gets here.
SYCOPHANT:
That's right.
You understand exactly what I
do.
PISTHETAIROS:
And then, while he's travelling here by ship,
you fly out there to seize his
property.
1900
SYCOPHANT:
You've said it all. I've got to whip
around
[1460]
just like a whirling top.
PISTHETAIROS:
I understand—
a whirling top. Well, here, by
god, I've got
the finest wings. They're
from Corcyra . . . here!
[Pisthetairos produces a whip from the basket and begins hitting the Sycophant, who dodges around to evade the blows]
SYCOPHANT: Ouch! That's a whip you've got!
PISTHETAIROS:
No—a pair of wings.
With them I'll make you spin
around all day!
SYCOPHANT: Ow! Help! That hurts!
PISTHETAIROS:
Wing your way from here!
Get lost—I want rid of you, you rascal!
I'll show you legal tricks
and twists—sharp ones, too!
[Pisthetairos beats the Sycophant off stage. Enter Xanthias and Manodorus from the house]
Let's gather up these wings and go inside. 1910
[Pisthetairos and the two slaves carry the baskets of wings back into the house]
CHORUS:
When we fly
[1470]
we often spy
strange amazing spots—
in those flights
peculiar sights.
There's a tree grows far from us
simply called Cleonymos,
a useless tree, without a heart—
immense, and vile in every
part.
It always blooms in early
spring,
1920
bursting forth with
everything
that launches legal
quarrelling.
and then in winter time it
yields
[1480]
a shedding foliage of
shields.
There's a land
ringed by the dark,
a gloomy wilderness,
where Heroes meet
and with men eat.
Men live with heroes in that place,
1930
except at dusk—then it's not safe
for the two of them to meet.
Men who in the night time
greet
[1490]
the great Orestes are
stripped bare
he strikes at them and
leaves them there.
And so without their
clothes they bide—
paralysed on their right
side.*
[Enter Prometheus, muffling his face in a long scarf and holding an unopened umbrella]
PROMETHEUS:
Oh, dear, dear, dear. I pray Zeus doesn't see me.
Where's Pisthetairos?
[Pisthetairos enters from the house carrying a chamber pot. He is surprised to see the new arrival]
PISTHETAIROS: Who's this? Why so muffled?
PROMETHEUS: Do you see any god who's trailed me here? 1940
PISTHETAIROS: No, by Zeus, I don't. But who are you?
PROMETHEUS: What time of day is it?
PISTHETAIROS:
What time of day?
A little after noon. But who
are you?
PROMETHEUS: Quitting time or later? [1500]
PISTHETAIROS: You’re pissing me off . . .
PROMETHEUS:
What's Zeus up to? What about the clouds—
is he scattering 'em—or bringing 'em together?
PISTHETAIROS: You're a total fool!
PROMETHEUS: All right—then I'll unwrap.
[Prometheus takes off the muffler concealing his face]
PISTHETAIROS: Prometheus, my friend!
PROMETHEUS: Hey, quiet. Don't shout.
PISTHETAIROS: What's the matter?
PROMETHEUS:
Shhh . . . don't shout my name.
I'm done for if Zeus can see
I'm
here.
1950
But I'll tell you what's
going on up there,
if you take this umbrella. Hold
it up,
above our heads—that way no god can see.
PISTHETAIROS:
Ah ha! Now that's a smart precaution—
[1510]
that's forethought, just
like Prometheus!
Come under here—make it fast—all right, now,
you can talk without a worry.
[Pisthetairos and Prometheus huddle together under the umbrella]
PROMETHEUS: Then listen.
PISTHETAIROS: I'm listening—speak up.
PROMETHEUS: Zeus is done for.
PISTHETAIROS: And when was he done in?
PROMETHEUS:
It happened
once you colonized the air.
From that point on,
1960
no human being has made a sacrifice
to any god, not once—and since that time
no savoury smells from roasting
thigh bones
have risen up to us from down
below.
So now, without our offerings,
we must fast,
as if it’s time for
Thesmophoria.*
The barbarian gods are starving—so
now
[1520]
they scream out like Illyrians and say
their armies will march down
attacking Zeus,
unless he moves to get the
ports re-opened,
1970
to make sliced entrails once again available.
PISTHETAIROS:
You mean other gods, barbarian ones,
are there above you?
PROMETHEUS:
Barbarian deities? Of course.
That’s where Execestides
derives
all his ancestral family
gods.
PISTHETAIROS: What's the name of these barbarian gods?
PROMETHEUS: The name? They're called Triballians.*
PISTHETAIROS:
I see—that must be where we get our phrase
they've got me "by the balls."
[1530]
PROMETHEUS:
You got that right.
Now let me tell you something
to the point—
1980
ambassadors are coming here to settle this,
from Zeus and those Triballians
up there.
But don't agree to peace unless great Zeus
gives back his sceptre to
the birds again,
and gives the Princess to
you as your wife.
PISTHETAIROS: Whose this Princess?
PROMETHEUS:
The loveliest of girls—
she's the one in charge of
Zeus' thunderbolt
and all his assets—wise advice, good laws,
sound common sense,
dockyards, slanderous talk—
[1540]
his paymistress who hands three obols
out
1990
to jury men . . .
PISTHETAIROS:
So in Zeus' name,
she's the one in charge
of everything?
PROMETHEUS:
That's right.
If you get her from Zeus,
you've got it all.
That's why I came here
to tell you this.
I've always been a
friend of human beings.
PISTHETAIROS:
Yes, of all the gods it's thanks to you
that we can fry up fish.*
PROMETHEUS:
I hate all gods—
but you know that.
PISTHETAIROS:
You’ve always hated them.
Heaven knows—it's something natural to you.
PROMETHEUS:
I’m Timon through and through.* Time to get
back. 2000
So let me have the parasol. That way,
if Zeus does catch sight of me
from there,
he'll think I’m following
some basket girl.
PISTHETAIROS:
Take the piss pot, too—then you can act
as if you're the one who's
carrying the stool.
[Prometheus leaves with the umbrella and the pot. Pisthetairos goes back into the house]
CHORUS:
By that tribe of men with such huge feet
they use them for a shade
retreat,
there's stands a lake where
Socrates,
deceives men's souls,
that unwashed tease.
Peisander went there to find
out
2010
the spirit his life had been without.
A big young camel he did
slay,
[1560]
then, like Odysseus, snuck away.
By camel's blood to that
place drawn,
up pops a Bat—it's Chaerephon!*
[Enter Poseidon, Hercules, and the Triballian god]
POSEIDON:
Here it is—Cloudcuckooland—in plain view,
city we've come to as
ambassadors.
[Poseidon inspects the clothing on the Triballian god]
What are you doing? Why drape your cloak that way,
from right to left? It's got to
be re-slung
the other way—like this.
[The Triballian tries to reshape his cloak but gets in a mess]
You fumbling idiot—
2020
a born Laespodias, that’s what you are!*
O democracy! Where are you
taking
us,
[1570]
when gods vote in a clumsy oaf like this?
[Poseidon
continues to fuss over the Triballian’s appearance]
Keep your hands still! Oh, to hell with you!
You're the most uncivilized
of all the gods
I've ever seen. All
right, Hercules,
what do we do?
HERCULES:
You've heard what I propose.
I'd like to wring his
neck—whoever he is
who set up this blockade
against the gods.
POSEIDON:
But you forget, my friend, that we've been sent
2030
as envoys to negotiate down here.
HERCULES:
That just makes me want to throttle him
twice as much as I wanted to
before.
[The wall of the house now moves off to reveal Pisthetairos and the slaves getting dinner ready. They are preparing birds to cook in the oven]
PISTHETAIROS:
The grater for the cheese—can someone get it?
And bring the silphium. Hand me
the cheese.
Now, fire up the coals.
[1580]
POSEIDON:
Greetings, mortal.
We three are gods, and we
salute you!
PISTHETAIROS: But I'm grating silphium right now.
HERCULES: What kind of meat is this?
PISTHETAIROS:
The meat's from birds—
they've been tried and
sentenced for rebellion,
2040
rising up against the fowl democracy.
HERCULES:
Is that why you're shredding silphium
all over them before doing
something else?
PISTHETAIROS
[looking up and recognizing Hercules]
Well, hello there,
Hercules. What's up?
POSEIDON:
We've come as envoys sent down from the gods
to negotiate the terms for
peace.
PISTHETAIROS: [to one of the slaves] There's no oil left in the jug.
HERCULES:
And bird meat
should be glistening with lots
of
oil.
[1590]
POSEIDON:
We gods get no advantage from this war.
If you and yours were friendly
to the gods,
2050
you'd have water from the rain in all your ponds—
halcyon days would be here
all the time.
We've come with total
powers in such things.
PISTHETAIROS:
From the start we didn't launch a war on you—
and we're ready to talk
peace, if that's your wish,
provided you’re prepared to
do what's right.
And here's what's right:
Zeus gives his sceptre back
to us—I mean the birds—once more. And then,
if we can settle this on these
conditions,
I'll invite the envoys to
have lunch with
me.
2060
HERCULES:
[salivating over the prepared bird]
That's just fine with me! I
vote we say . . .
POSEIDON:
[interrupting] What's that you fool! Idiotic glutton!
You want give away your father's
power?
[1600]
PISTHETAIROS:
Is that what you think? Look, if birds here
rule everything down there, won't
you gods above
be even stronger? Now
underneath the clouds
men can bend down and swear
false oaths to you.
But once the birds and you
become allies,
[1610]
if any man should swear by
Raven and by Zeus
and then perjure himself,
Raven would come
by,
2070
swoop down upon the man
before he sees him,
peck at his eye and pluck
it out.
POSEIDON:
By Poseidon,
what you're saying makes good
sense!
HERCULES: Sounds good to me.
PISTHETAIROS: [to the Triballian god] What do you say?
TRIBALLIAN: Nab aist roo.
PISTHETAIROS:
You hear what he said? He agrees with you.
Now listen up—here's yet another benefit
you'll get from us. If any
man once vows
to one of the gods he'll
sacrifice a beast,
then tries to talk his way out
of doing it
by splitting hairs and, acting
on his greed,
2080
holds back his vow, saying
"Gods are patient,"
[1620]
we'll make him pay for
that as well.
POSE
How?
Tell us how you'd do that.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, at some point,
when that man is counting up
his wealth
or sitting in his bath, some
kite will fly down,
while he's not paying
attention, grab his cash,
the value of two sheep, and
carry that
up to the god.
HERCULES:
He gets my vote again—
I say we give the sceptre back
to them.
POSEIDON: All right—ask the Triballian. 2090
HERCULES:
[threateningly]
Hey, you—
Triballian—want me to smack you round?
TRIBALLIAN: [afraid] Oo smacka skeen dat steek?
HERCULES:
He says it's fine—
he agrees with me.
POSEIDON:
Well, if it's what you
want,
[1630]
then it's all
right with me.
HERCULES:
[to Pisthetairos] Hey, we're ready to agree to terms
about the sceptre.
PISTHETAIROS:
By god, there's one more thing—
I've just remembered. I'll let Zeus keep Hera,
but he must give me that young girl Princess.
She's to be my wife.
POSEIDON:
Then you don't want
a real negotiation. Come on, let's go back home.
PISTHETAIROS:
That's up to you. Hey, cook, watch that gravy.
2100
Make sure you make
it sweet!
HERCULES:
Hey, Poseidon,
my dear fellow, where you going? Come on,
are we going to war about a woman?
POSEIDON: What should we do?
HERCULES: Do? Settle this matter.
POSEIDON:
What? You fool! Don't you see what he's doing,
how all this time he's been deceiving you?
You're ruining yourself, you know. If Zeus dies,
after giving all his sovereignty to birds,
you'll have nothing. Right now you're his heir—
you get whatever's left when Zeus departs.
2200
PISTHETAIROS:
[to Hercules]
Oh dear, dear—how he's trying to play with you.
Come on over here—let me tell you something.
[Pisthetairos and Hercules talk apart from the others]
You uncles's putting one over on you,
you poor fool—because, according to the law,
you don't get the smallest piece of property
from your father's goods. You're illegitimate—
[1650]
you're a bastard.
HERCULES: A bastard? What do you mean?
PISTHETAIROS:
I mean just what I say. Now, your mother—
she was an alien woman. And Athena—
do you think a daughter could inherit
2210
if she's got legal brothers?
HERCULES:
[very puzzled]
But once he dies,
couldn't my dad leave me all his property
as a bastard's share?
PISTHETAIROS:
The law won't let him.
The first one to claim your father's property
will be Poseidon here, who's raised your hopes.
He'll claim he's your father's legal brother.
I'll read you what Solon's laws dictate—
[1660]
[Pisthetairos pulls a piece of paper out and reads]
"If there are
lawful children, then a bastard
has no rights as a close blood relative.
If there are no lawful children, the
goods
2220
go to the nearest
next of kin."
HERCULES:
What!
I don't get
anything from daddy’s stuff?
PISTHETAIROS:
Not a thing, by god. So tell me this—
has your father introduced you
to his kin group yet?*
HERCULES:
No, not me. As a matter of fact,
I've been wondering about
that for some time.
PISTHETAIROS:
Well, don't just stare up there, mouth wide open,
planning an assault. Join
up with us instead.
I'll make you a king and
give you bird's
milk.
2230
HERCULES:
I've always thought you’re right in what you say
about the girl. I'd hand
her over to you.
PISTHETAIROS: [to Poseidon] What do you say?
POSEIDON: I vote no.
PISTHETAIROS:
So now,
it's up to the Triballian
here. What you say?
TRIBALLIAN: De geerl geeve over greet souvrin bridies.
HERCULES: There! He says to hand her over.
POSEIDON:
No by god.
[1680]
he never said to give her up—no way.
He’s just babbling like a
swallow.
HERCULES: So he said hand her over to the swallows!
POSEIDON:
You two work it out—agree on peace
terms.
2240
Since you’re both for it, I’ll say nothing more.
HERCULES:
We ready now to give you all you ask.
So come along with us in person—
up to heaven—there you can get your Princess,
and all those other things as
well.
PISTHETAIROS:
[pointing to the cooking he’s been preparing]
So these birds were
slaughtered in good time
before the wedding feast.
HERCULES:
If you want to,
I could stay here and roast the
meat. You go.
[1690]
POSEIDON:
Roast the meat? You mean you'd wolf it down,
you glutton. Come on with
us. Let's
go.
2250
HERCULES: [reluctantly leaving] I'd have enjoyed eating that.
PISTHETAIROS:
[calling to his slaves]
Hey, you—
one of you bring me out some
wedding clothes!
CHORUS:
In lands of Litigation there's a place—
it's right beside the
water clock—
where that villainous and
thieving race
of tongue-and-belly men all
flock.
They use their tongues to
sow and reap,
to harvest grapes and figs
en masse.
A crude barbarian tribe, a
heap
[1700]
of Philipses and
Gorgias.
2260
From these horse-loving sycophants,
who use their tongues to cram
their gut,
through all of Attica’s
expanse
in sacrifice the tongue's
first cut.*
[Enter Second Herald]
SECOND
HERALD: You here who’ve done fine things, more wonderful
than I can say, you
thrice-blessed race with wings,
you birds, welcome now
your king on his return,
as he comes back among
these wealthy halls.
Here he approaches—you'll never see a star
so bright in any gleaming
home of gold.
2270 [1710]
No—not even the far-reaching
rays of sun
have ever shone as splendidly
as he,
the man who brings with him his
lovely wife,
too beautiful for words, and
brandishing
the winged thunderbolt from
Zeus. Sweet smells
are rising up, high into heaven's
vault,
a glorious spectacle, and
wisps of smoke
from burning incense are
blown far and wide.
Here he is in person. Let
the sacred Muse
open her lips in a
triumphal holy
song.
2280
[Enter Pisthetairos and his bride Princess]
CHORUS: Back off, break up, make room—
[1720]
And wing your way around the man
so blessed with blissful
fortune.
Oh, oh—such beauty and such youth!
What a blessing for this city
of the birds
is this fine marriage you have
made.
A great good fortune now attends us,
the race of birds—such mighty bliss,
thanks to this man. So welcome
back
with nuptial chants and wedding
songs
2290
our man himself and his Princess.
Olympian Hera and great Zeus
who rules the gods on lofty
thrones
the Fates once joined with
wedding songs.
O Hymen, Hymenaeus*
And rich young Eros in his golden wings
held tight the reins as
charioteer
at Zeus’ wedding to the happy
Hera.
O Hymen, Hymenaeus,
O Hymen,
Hymenaeus.
2300
PISTHETAIROS:
Your chants fill me with great delight,
as do you songs. And I just
love your words.
CHORUS:
Come now, celebrate in song
earth-shattering thunder, Zeus'
lightning fire—
which now belong to him—
that dreaded bolt white
lighting, too.
Oh, that great golden blaze
of lightning,
that immortal fiery spear
of Zeus,
and groaning thunders
bringing rain—
[1750]
with you this man now rattles Earth.
2310
And everything that Zeus once had,
he's got it all—and that includes
our Princess, who once sat
by Zeus' throne.
O Hymen, Hymenaeus!
PISTHETAIROS:
Now all you feathered tribes of friends,
come follow me on this my
wedding flight.
Let's wing our way up there
to Zeus' house
and to our wedding bed.
Reach out your hand,
my blissful love, and take
hold of my wing—
[1760]
then dance with me. I'll lift and carry
you.
2320
[Pisthetairos and Princess lead the procession off the stage]
CHORUS:
Alalalalai—
Raise triumphal cries of joy,
sing out the noble victor’s
song—
the mightiest and highest
of all gods!
[The procession exits singing and dancing, accompanying Pisthetairos and his bride up to Heaven]
Notes
*Execestides: An Athenian descended from Carian slaves and therefore not
entitled to be a citizen. The point here is that he must have been extremely
skilful to get to Athens, given where he started, and even he couldn’t
navigate his way back to Athens in this terrain. [Back
to Text]
*Tereus: the name of a mythological king of Thrace who married Procne and raped her sister Philomela. The sisters killed his son and fed Tereus the flesh for dinner. All three were changed into birds: Tereus into a hoopoe, Procne into a nightingale, and Philomela into a swallow. Tharreleides: the reference here seems to be to a well-known member of the audience, perhaps celebrated for his small size and loud voice. [Back to Text]
*birds: the Greek expression is “to the Ravens,” meaning “go to hell.” [Back to text]
*Sacas: a name for Acestor, a foreign-born tragic dramatist. [Back to Text]
*tribe and clan: the political units of Athenian civic life. [Back to Text]
*basket, pot, and myrtle boughs: these materials were necessary to conduct the sacrifices at the founding of a new city. [Back to Text]
*twelve gods: the major Olympian deities, headed by Zeus. [Back to Text]
*Most Athenians knew very little about peacocks. [Back to Text]
*Cranaus: reference to a mythological king who founded Athens or a word derived from kranaos, meaning rugged, a word often applied to Athens. [Back to Text]
*son of Scellias: reference is to a man called Aristocrates, an important politician-soldier in Athens. [Back to Text]
*difficult for me: this is a utopian fantasy because the neighbour is suggesting that, as a punishment, his friend Euelpides would not have to help him if he gets in financial trouble, even though he’s invited him to an important family celebration. [Back to Text]
*Red Sea: a general term for any sea by the southern coasts of Asia. [Back to Text]
*summons: Athenian citizens could be legally summoned home for trial. Salamia was an official ship often used for such voyages. [Back to Text]
*Melanthius' fault: the reference is to an Athenian tragic dramatist who had a very bad skin condition (making him look as if he had leprosy). [Back to Text]
*Opuntius: a widely disliked Athenian informer. A talent's weight is just under 30 kilograms. [Back to Text]
*Teleus: Athenian politician with a reputation for being unpredictable. [Back to Text]
*Melos: the Athenians committed a horrible atrocity during the Peloponnesian War, starving the population of Melos and then executing all male citizens. [Back to Text]
*In some productions of The Birds the set design permits the audience to see inside Tereus' quarters, so that the singer of the songs which follow remains visible to the audience. Alternatively, Tereus could move out onto a rocky balcony to deliver his song. It seems dramatically very weak to have him deliver these lyrics out of sight of the audience. [Back to Text]
*Itys: son of Tereus and Procne, killed by his mother, who served him up as dinner, in revenge for Tereus' rape and mutilation of her sister. [Back to Text]
*Hipponicus: this passages refers to the Greek custom of naming children after their grandfathers. Philocles was a tragic dramatist. Callias, his son, was a notorious spendthrift who squandered his family inheritance on a debauched lifestyle. [Back to Text]
*Cleonymus: an Athenian politician well known for his eating habits and his size. He also reputedly once threw his shield away in battle and ran off. [Back to Text]
*safer: Pisthetairos refers to a race in which the runners wore helmets with plumes (crests), but Tereus misunderstands and talks about mountain crests where the birds live. Caria is in Asia Minor. [Back to Text]
*shaver: the Greek bird kerulos was a mythological species. The passage here plays on the similarity of the verb keirein meaning to cut hair. [Back to Text]
*Athens: to bring owls to Athens is an expression for something totally unnecessary (like bringing coals to Newcastle). [Back to Text]
*Nikias: Athenian general famous for his tactical skill. [Back to Text]
*Orneai: a siege in which some Athenians took part. There were no casualties. [Back to Text]
*win: a reference to the fact that The Birds is competing in a drama festival. [Back to Text]
*Earth: Kronos was the father of Zeus; the Titans were the sons of Kronos. Earth was the original mother goddess. [Back to Text]
*Halimus: a community on the coast near Athens. [Back to the Text]
*kite: an old Greek custom of saluting the kite as the bird announcing the arrival of spring by rolling on the ground. This speech refers to the habit of carrying small coins in the mouth. Having eaten his money, he can’t buy the food he set out to purchase. [Back to Text]
*These lines are an attempt to deal with an totally obscure sexual pun in the Greek. [Back to Text]
*Lysicrates gets: a reference to a corrupt Athenian politician. [Back to Text]
*Lampon: a well known soothsayer in Athens. “By Goose” is a euphemistic way of swearing “By Zeus.” [Back to Text]
*Kebriones and Porphyrion were two Giants who fought against the Olympian gods. [Back to the Text]
*These women all had sexual encounters with gods. Alkmene and Zeus produced Hercules; Semele and Zeus produced Dionysus; and Alope and Poseidon produced Hippothoon. [Back to the Text]
*Zan: an archaic and contemptuous name for Zeus. [Back to the Text]
*crow: in legend and folk lore the life span of the crow was enormous. [Back to Text]
*Nikias: Athenian general, famous for his hesitation about tactics. [Back to Text]
*Erebus: the primeval darkness. [Back to Text]
*Prodicus: a reference to a well known philosopher who offered a materialistic explanation for the origin of the gods.[Back to Text]
*These lines refer to the custom of giving one's lover a bird as a present. [Back to Text]
*Orestes: the reference is to a well-known thief of other people’s clothing. [Back to Text]
*In other words, we’re all the oracles you need. Ammon, Delphi, and Dodona are
shrines
famous for prophecy. Apollo is the god of prophecy. [Back
to Text]
*Diitrephes: prominent Athenian politician and general. A horse-cock is a mythological animal with the front of a horse and the rear of a cock. [Back to Text]
*poor people used esparto grass to make rope chords to hold up the mattress. Rich folks used linen. The pun here is obviously on Sparta-esparto. Euelpides won’t have anything to do with Sparta or anything that sounds like it. [Back to Text]
*Theogenes and Aeschines: two Athenian business men who constantly boasted they were richer than they were. [Back to Text]
*the giants were the monstrous children of Uranus; the gods are the Olympians, headed by Zeus. The point here is that Cloudcuckooland is so great, it's a place for divine boasting, not just the sort of thing rich Athenians might brag about. [Back to Text]
*Cleisthenes: a well-known homosexual in Athens, often satirized by Aristophanes. [Back to Text]
*The officer inspecting the sentries regularly rang a small bell to indicate that all was well. [Back to Text]
*Hestia: traditional goddess of the hearth. [Back to Text]
*Cleocritus: a very ugly Athenian who was often compared to an ostrich. [Back to Text]
*The Chians were staunch allies of Athens in the Peloponnesian War. [Back to Text]
*Simonides: well known lyric poet of the previous generation. [Back to Text]
*These lines are a jumble of allusions to well known poems. The founder of Aetna is Heiron, ruler of Syracuse, whose name is the same as the word for “of holy things.” In Homer a nod of the head signifies divine assent. [Back to Text]
*Lampon and Diopeithes were well-known soothsayers in Athens. [Back to Text]
*Meton was a famous astronomer and engineer. [Back to Text]
*Colonus: a district of Athens. [Back to Text]
*Thales: very famous astronomer and thinker from distant past. Thales is often considered the founder of philosophy. [Back to Text]
*Commissioner: an official who was sent out to supervise and report on a new colony. [Back to Text]
*Sardanapallos was the last king of Assyria, famous in legend for his extravagant lifestyle and appearance. [Back to Text]
*Teleas, an Athenian politician, would have proposed sending the Commissioner out.[Back to Text]
*Pharnakes was an important Persian official. Dealing with him would be considered treasonous in some quarters. [Back to Text]
*A small town in the remote north east of Greece (by Mount Athos). [Back to Text]
*At the drama festival formal public announcements like this were part of the script. Diagoras was a notorious atheist who had fled Athens. The reward for killing old tyrants was part of a ritual pronouncement to protect democracy. [Back to Text]
*Alexander: another name for Paris of Troy. [Back to Text]
*The owls of Laureium are coins. The owl was stamped on Athenian coins, and Laureium was the site of the silver mines. [Back to Text]
*Greek temples commonly had triangular pediments known as “eagles.” [Back to Text]
*Pisthetairus compares Iris to a ship because her dressing is billowing like a sail. The two names he gives are the two main flag ships of the Athenian fleet. [Back to Text]
*Porphyrion was the name of one of the giants who went to war against Zeus. [Back to Text]
*the lines following refer to a number of political figures in Athens. [Back to Text]
*this reference is to a very popular betting game in which a quail was placed inside a circle and tapped on the head to see if it would back off or stand its ground. [Back to Text]
*Manes is probably another name for Manodoros, since there are only two slaves in the play [Back to Text]
*I follow Sommerstein’s useful suggestion and add this line here to make sense of the lines which follow. [Back to Text]
*At the festival for tragic drama, the war orphans were paraded around in special armour given to them by the state. [Back to Text]
*Cinesias was a well known and frequently satirized poet in Athens. He was
extremely thin and evidently suffered very badly from diarrhea. [Back
to Text]
*the
tribes were the political divisions in Athenian life. The dithyrambic
competitions were organized by tribes, each one wanting the services of the best
poets.
[Back to
Text]
*Leotrophides was another Athenian famous for being extremely thin (like Cinesias). [Back to Text]
*the point here seems to be that the Sycophant’s cloak is so thin and worn that he’s singing for warm weather, when he won’t need it. [Back to Text]
*Cranes reputedly swallowed stones to serve as ballast on their flights. [Back to Text]
*These lines refer to the notion that meeting up with ghosts of heroes is all right during the day but harmful at night. There is also another reference here to the thief Orestes (mentioned earlier by the Chorus Leader) who beats people and steals their clothes. [Back to Text]
*Thesmophoria: an important religious festival in Greece, during which there was a period of fasting. [Back to Text]
*Triballians: the name of a barbarian tribe in Thrace, north of Greece. [Back to Text]
*Prometheus stole fire from heaven and gave it to human beings. [Back to Text]
*Timon was a legendary Athenian who hated his fellow citizens. [Back to Text]
*Peisander: an Athenian with a reputation for corruption and cowardice. Chaerephon was well known as an associate of Socrates. [Back to Text]
*Laespodias: Athenian politician who dressed oddly to conceal his misshapen legs. [Back to Text]
*A kin group (phrateres) was a group of citizens who shared a common ancestor. [Back to Text]
*These lines attack the Sophists who earned their living by teaching rhetoric. Gorgias was a famous sophist and Philip was his pupil and disciple. They are called horse-loving either to suggest extravagant ambitions or their non-Athenian tribal origins. In sacrificing an animal, the Athenians cut out the tongue first. The suggestion seems to be that that's what the speaker would like to do with the Sophists. [Back to Text]
*A customary salute to the gods of marriage. [Back to Text]
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